Jesus Heartburn

2011-10-30T15:09:00.000-05:00

A Wedding Day

2011-10-29T15:31:00.000-05:00

One of our AUNTIES got married today! 24 children, 7 staff, and I traveled in the poda pod (OH MY!) all the way to the East End of town to enjoy the day. We started out at 8 and returned home 11 hours later but every hour spent stuffed in that van with 30 other people was worth it.

I was excited to see if a SL wedding was different from an "American" wedding. It's not that different. A bit more relaxed; you are free to yell and use silly string and confetti throughout the whole ceremony! There were 2 offering during the service, which I was NOT prepared for but thankfully I had a couple thousand in my purse. I think that at least 25 people signed the wedding license and there was a pledge time where people stood and pledged what they would give the couple in the future...they will be receiving LOTS of diapers if they ever are blessed with a little one:) And different groups and families wore matching clothes...you'll see our beautiful style below.

I have a few pictures of the day but none of the bride:(

The children sang a song about marriage for the couple.

Waiting for the reception to begin...HOT and TIRED and HUNGRY is the look on their faces!

The TRS staff sang LOUDLY and ENTHUSIASTICALLY and slightly out of tune.

But they DANCED well and they ENJOYED the party!

The flower girls and the page boy...this is at the end of the day when we arrived back at the center...they could barely stand up straight they were so tired.

2011-10-28T08:12:00.000-05:00

I've been having a lot of Elijah moments lately. I wish it were the BIG moments when he fed people or showed God's glory to hundreds of false god worshippers. It would be nice if it were similar to his prayers that stopped rain for 3 years and then got God to send rain again just at the right time. I'd like a dose of his confidence, his faithfulness, and his courage. But those aren't where I'm at right now. It would even be okay if they were the silent moments of Elijah...I'm sure there were many good things that he did that aren't recorded in history!

In 1 Kings 19 Elijah runs away...

He's just defeated a worship system that has enslaved people for years.

He's won ground for the Lord by showing that God's power is greater than any other.

He's killed hundreds of his enemies.

He ran a race and beat a king in a chariot.

He's prayed for rain and seen an immediate answer.

BUT he is threatened by a woman--yes she's the queen but he's faced her before--and he RUNS AWAY.

He goes and sits under a broom tree and asks God to finish him off.

He's tired.

crabby.

hungry.

thirsty.

He's wondering where God is.

Where's his reward.

protection.

success.

friends.

And I LOVE what God does next he sends an Angel with water, food, sleep and REST. Because God knows that we are whole people...that's how he made us...and we cannot function without enough food, water, and sleep...EVEN if we are doing good things for him, eventually we all come to the point where we have to sit down under the broom tree and get fed. And I don't think we are supposed to spiritualize this and say God gave him the spiritual food he needed to go on...that comes later...in this moment Elijah gets EXACTLY what he needs--real, physical food and water and sleep.

Then God addresses his crabbiness and his wonder with a question, "“What are you doing here, Elijah?”

And Elijah is not afraid to give his real, honest answer filled with all his wonders and self-righteousness...“I have zealously served the Lord God Almighty. But the people of Israel have broken their covenant with you, torn down your altars, and killed every one of your prophets. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me, too.” OR "I've done all that you asked. Why have you left me alone! Hello, I am following you and this is NOT the way the story is supposed to be!"

God's answer is beautiful.

a storm.

an earthquake.

a fire.

a whisper. (my translation says a thin silence)

Elijah goes to stand with God. WOW! and repeats the same thing...God asks, "why are you here?" Elijah responds, "It's not fair and I am all alone but I follow you!"

And God answers with EXACTLY what Elijah needs...Hope for the future!

New kings to anoint.

7,000 other followers who never bowed to false gods.

An apprentice to take his place when the time came for him to die.

Elijah goes away from this time with God refreshed physically. He's heard by a compassionate Father who reminds him gently that he is not alone and all is not lost. He steps back into life/ministry with a new plan. God gives him a companion and reminds him that the work of the Lord will go on through others long after he is gone. His plan is bigger.

than one event.

one moment.

one prayer.

one king.

one defeat.

one earthquake.

one prophet.

one nation.

There is so much we can learn from this account from Elijah. I shared the story at staff devotions and one staff member said he loved this story because it showed God's Word is inspired. If it wasn't the writer would have left out this part that makes Elijah look like anything but a hero. We like our heros to be strong always, unwavering in faith, and sure. But maybe that's why I love Elijah so much...he, like so many of the Bible's characters, was flawed and human!

I think that no matter where we serve or how we serve, if we are serving the Lord we all face Elijah moments...we face the ones where everything is good and God's hand on us is evident to all; we face the ones where we run away, get stuck under a broom tree, and have to have the Lord rescue us. He lovingly changes feeds us, listens to us, speaks to us in silence, and changes our focus. Maybe he gives us a new ministry or like Elijah shows us how to turn it over to someone next. I don't know where you are at...I know where I am.

I'm at the end of a season.

tired.

crabby.

hungry for home.

thirsty for diet coke.

Wondering what's next.

how do I finish well.

where do I go from here.

looking for a broom tree...not to die under! just to get some rest!

And God is gently reminding me his plan is bigger.

than one year.

one opportunity.

one dream.

one prayer.

one defeat.

one nation.

one idea.

He is always good,

His grace is sufficient

and I am always loved....and so are you.

A Birthday Celebration: July-September

2011-10-27T07:08:00.000-05:00

The CAKE...chocolate. YUMMY!

Our Grandpa lead the singing.

The celebrants!

Happy Birthday!

Always ready to pose for the camera.

JUICE!

POPCORN!

Favorite Big Sister

Not a fan of silly hats.

The girls.

2011-10-25T04:55:00.000-05:00

Over the last year I've gotten pretty good at ignoring the poverty around me. It's a terrible thing, perhaps, but it is also coping. Our Social Worker keeps telling me, "Cari if you try to help everyone you'll help no one and you'll have nothing left." I often find comfort in knowing that when Jesus walked this messy earth HE didn't heal everyone, talk to everyone, or rescue everyone. In fact, I don't know if he lifted a single person out of poverty. He fed a few, prayed with and for them but mostly he lived with them...as a poor man...and reminded them that there is more to life than what you do or don't have. He denounced the systems that held them captive and oppressed them and HE declared that rich or poor...the KINGDOM OF HEAVEN is yours if you choose it.

But this ignoring only goes so far, and there are days when I am so overwhelmed by what I see and what I have and many don't have that I can barely function. In living color I see the contrast between the house that I live in here with it's running water and electricity and the shack next door build out of tarps and tin. When I am driving, ALONE in my car I see the LOOOOOOONG lines of people waiting for a ride on a bus that should seat 10 but will seat 25+, or the new city buses that can hold hundreds if you pack them in tight enough. I drive by the market where people buy barely enough food--that's been sitting out in the hot sun covered with flies--for one meal; I am on my way to the supermarket where I have been known to complain when they don't have the kind of ice cream bar I like.

I had one of those days last week. I was out to get my weekly supply of groceries and on the way back all I could see was children. EVERYWHERE! Walking on the side of the road, shopping in the markets, selling cookies and fruit, and toting 5 gallon buckets of water. And my heart cried...Jesus, why?!? It's a school day! They look hungry! They should be playing and learning! WHY!?! and then I started to think...which one is mine to care for? I know I can only take one or maybe two, which one is mine? And the LORD who knows and understand me and loves me said this to my heart...."That one is mine! The one in the pink frilly dress, SHE IS MINE!" And I began to see the smiles on their faces. The adults around them who were holding their hands; the strangers who were helping them to cross the street.

There is a richness in followers of Christ here that I wonder if many who grew up in the US can truly understand or obtain. Pastor Daniel says often that riches come from a content heart...in knowing that God provides and trusting that provision however big or small is from HIM and is for a purpose.

My eyes have been opened to the world around me...but there is blessed and sweet rest for my soul in this...the God of the Universe, who created each one of these dear little ones, knows each by name. He watches over them. He might call me or you to care for a few; to be a part of HIS hand in their lives and we should listen when HE does and be ready. They are ALWAYS HIS.

He is mine! See the one who holds his hand, that is me.

She is mine! See that smile, I put it there.

That one's mine!

AND

You are mine!

A Queen

2011-10-21T12:33:00.000-05:00

Today we had a special visitor...Miss West Africa Sierra Leone!

She read to the children and talked to them about doing well in school and working to become someone someday. They told her they want to be lawyers, doctors, presidents, teachers, nurses, bankers, dolphins and sharks when they grow up:) Our girls all want to be African Queens now...me I was just amazed again at our children! They were warm and welcoming, they gave speeches and sang songs, and they impressed that Queen to tears!

Here is our own Miss TRS African Queen!

2011-10-14T07:18:00.000-05:00

Here's some pictures of our last few weeks at The Covering.

The Ruth girls came over for dinner. We ate chicken (including the bones), pizza, rice, and salad. YUM! We also told jokes and learned to eat with a fork and knife.

Sam's school doesn't start for a few weeks, I have been giving him assignments each morning...here he is writing a letter to a man in Spain who collects letters from all over the world. I'm not sure if he'll ever receive this one from Sierra Leone but the field trip to the post office was great fun.

We are still getting a bit of rain. See the clouds? But recess is back!

The library is open!

It's hot and we are sweating all the time...mostly it's me that is sweating:)

Baby Cari came to visit. She ate more rice than I did:)

The babies room got new bowls and spoons.

They also got new potties compliments of the Babies Room Staff. Amazing that they would donate to this ministry too.

This a daily occurrence. I get stuck under a pile of kids. Love it!

Water Wasted.

2011-10-11T05:56:00.002-05:00

I notice different things now when I read the Bible. Stuff I never saw before or thought of as important.

Maybe because before this time in Sierra Leone I've always known that when you flip a light switch the lights come on...and if not it's on the news and everyone is talking about an outage. Here there is no pattern and no way to predict if there will be light or not. Everyday is a whole new adventure.

The water works that way too...sometimes you turn on a tap and NOTHING comes out. And it seems that everyday we have a discussion about the lack of water. I've never thought so much about water in my life.

So this week, when I was reading through 1 Kings, I read the familiar story of Elijah on Mnt. Carmel and was struck by something new...IT HADN'T RAINED FOR 3 YEARS! Imagine the water crisis! No wonder the king was crabby...he was also known as one who did more to anger the Lord than any king before him, not a great guy at all. Elijah calls the priests of Baal to call upon their god to consume their offering with fire and Baal doesn't show up; then he sets an offering out for YHWH. He has his servant gather 4 jars of water 3 times and pour it over the alter, in other words--Elijah WASTES water in the middle of a drought! I also feel compassion for that unnamed servant while reading this, to find that much water, in a drought, and haul it up the mountain was not an easy task! I've watched people carry 5 gallon buckets of water up a hill that I can barely climb without breathing like I just ran a marathon!

But back to the water...12 BIG jars full! GONE! This story is about so many things but I caught a glimpse...a picture, like the picture in the New Testament of a woman pouring perfume on the feet of Jesus...of faith that wastes what is most precious on earth to worship and express trust in a God who provides. Elijah had faith; he knew that when the people turned back to God because of this sacrifice and God's appearance on the mount, God would send rain. That which was "wasted" and consumed would be returned. Maybe Elijah wasn't sure of the results or the timing but he was simply sure that God would show up. Somehow, someway. He'd be there.

And after the confrontation is over, and Elijah has destroyed the priests of Baal (that's the edited for children's ministry version in the real version he slaughters them, but that's the stuff of nightmares and horror movies!) he prays for rain...and sends his servant 7 times to check to see if the rain clouds are gathering (again poor servant, he's go to be tired) and on the seventh time there is a cloud! The rain comes! Fast and furious! I imagine it to be like some of the rains we have here; not gentle and cleansing but FEIRCE and DRENCHING.

I used to think the water was only necessary so that everyone would know this is not a trick...now I wonder if it was something else entirely. Something to ponder anyway. I'm going to take some HUGE leaps here and share some things that I think might be for me in this new reading of the story...

God uses all kinds of things to get out attention...things that are good like miracles and rainbows and things that are hard like droughts and famines.

God cares about water...it's all over the place in the scriptures; must be important.

Sometimes it feels like I am wasting things that are precious on earth; it is not waste if it is done to bring glory to God.

Often when we waste things that are precious on earth, the God who provides often gives it back multiplied.

2011-10-05T09:35:00.000-05:00

Got this song stuck in my head today...it's been a long time (I was a small girl) since I've had this one playing in my head:) but it's just what I need today.

He's Still Working on Me
CHORUS:
He's still working on me to make me what I ought to be.
It took Him just a week to make the moon and stars,
The sun and the earth and Jupiter and Mars.
How loving and patient He must be, He's still working on me.
1. There really ought to be a sign upon the heart,
Don't judge her yet, there's an unfinished part.
But I'll be perfect just according to His plan
Fashioned by the Master's loving hands.
CHORUS:
2. In the mirror of His Word reflections that I see
Make me wonder why He never gave up on me.
He loves me as I am and helps me when I pray
Remember He's the Potter, I'm the clay.
CHORUS:
by Joel Hemphill

Day 35

2011-10-04T15:12:00.002-05:00

September 28, 2011

THE BEACH!

I have a serious love for the beach...WAVES, SUN, SAND, SHOPPING, FRESH SEAFOOD, DANCING (we had a sound system this time) and the SQUEALS and LAUGHTER of 90+ children and staff. It's my favorite day. I played "lifeguard" most of the time today...standing in the deep, watching to make sure no one got in over their head or swept up by a way...it's where I love to be, observing the joy and fun of others. I also took time to play; to dig my hands and toes into the sand and soak in the grace of God. He gives us all things to enjoy...good, perfect gifts...

Day 30

2011-10-04T15:11:00.001-05:00

September 23rd, 2011

Today I've felt a gentle easing--a realization that there is life and joy in the ordinary. Not every day will be spectacular or filled with extraordinary things. Most days will be filled with the ordinary...small things like sitting at a table and sharing a meal with a child, smiles, emails, a few pictures, quick connections--that's all.

We had a welcome ceremony today for the new team that arrived. They always wonder when they come what their purpose here is and God has a way of revealing His purpose...for them this place, these children will transform their thinking about who God is and what He is calling all of us to do...but mostly they are here for the simple, the ordinary...

to give a plastic bag of water

a piece of cheese

a piece of bread

to look a child in the eyes

say "I love you"

to pray and be prayed for

to be a "jungle gym" for a few days

paint a wall

HUG.

that's all but the ordinary will bring such joy to all of us and it will become extraordinary!

Day 28

2011-10-04T14:39:00.000-05:00

September 21, 2011

Anna Logan...my sister-in-love! How I love you!

Your encouragement, your prayers, and your love remind me that there is joy and life everyday. It's your birthday today and I am so grateful for you. Happy Birthday!

2011-10-02T13:09:00.004-05:00

If you didn't get the email...here's my newsletter for September!

Day 26

2011-09-21T12:48:00.000-05:00

September 19th, 2011

Me...I'm always making plans and lists and goals. Most of the lists and plans and goals never make it any farther than a piece of paper tucked away and eventually forgotten BUT I have made another plan and today I took the first step to carry it out!
I've decided that I will have everyone at the center over to the Guest House for dinner before I return to the states. WOW! That's a LOT of food...thank goodness Aunty M. likes my plan and has agreed to help:) Okay, I'll be honest, she does ALL the cooking. I just move a few chairs and greet the guests. She won't even let me help with the dishes and I'm totally fine with that too. I'll admit it, I'm lazy.
We've made a schedule and made sure that everyone will get a chance and tonight we started with Room 3 boys...the oldest ones! I am a bit scared of the room of 25 4-7 year old boys so I thought I'd start out on the easy end.
They came! Some of them didn't eat their rice for lunch because they were so excited to FEAST on Aunty M.'s chicken and fried rice and PIZZA! They were early! This is extremely unusual in Sierra Leone and I think it was because Pastor D. was in charge of them for the night and they were all EXCITED. We played a few board games...one of them decided to play a few tricks on me and hide some of my things! And we had a lesson in table manners--important for boys who are used to throwing food they don't want on the floor, eating only with spoons, and licking the top of ketchup bottles! And after we ate we sat and talked about life, speaking in tongues, and family curses. (Um, Pastor D. talked and answered their questions, I listened:)
One of the other things on my joy/meaning list a few days back was sharing meals with people. I also love to host meals...the kind where you make your best food, set the table nice, and plan to sit for a long time and enjoy each other. I don't do that enough and I can sense another plan...list...goal coming on for where ever I "land" next.
Oh, and can you please pray for me? That group of 25--I split them into two groups and they'll be coming on 2 different nights in October. BUT I'm still scared!

Day 21

2011-09-21T12:32:00.003-05:00

September 14th, 2011

Today I came back to the Guest House from the Center and found "We love you Aunty Karl" written on the fridge! This was obviously for me becuase we are missing some magnetic letters for our alphabet...the "C" and the "i"...and there are no karl's around. And, in high school some people called me Carl once in a while because they engraved my name wrong on my freshman yearbook! So it had to be for me!
Several of the girls had come over earlier in the day with another aunty to play in the activity room and visit Aunty M.
I didn't see it for a while...I sat down to eat my supper and there in front of me was another reminder that God is good.

Day 17

2011-09-21T12:26:00.000-05:00

September 10th, 2011
Today I took 2 boys from the center and we went to visit Aunty M.'s house. She's been on vacation for a while now and I have been missing her! She wanted me to come and see all the work she has done on her house...
Several of us visited her house a few months ago and she showed us how terrible her roof was. The zinc had rusted and the rain was soaking through the plywood ceiling and flooding the house. The cement siding was cracked and the foundation was being eaten away. It was the begining of the rainy season so she was in great need of some help.
Some friends and I donated some money...some other friends donated some labor...and she now has a new roof and ceiling...and no more leaking means that she can save and buy one bag or two of cement at a time and repair the walls and foundation.
The transformation was amazing! She has decorated and set up a corner for a dining room where she can invite guests and family to come and enjoy her FANTASTIC food. And so we ATE...chicken, spagetti, and chocolate cake with fudge frosting--of course. Wow!
So here's what I realized...I love seeing tangible ways where I have been able to make a difference. I think sometimes I just need to see it. Something concrete, something finished, or something the is clearly defined. I know that God is always working...always moving and providing...but when I see a rainbow (saw one of those today too!) or I see a miracle I am reminded of His power and His work...otherwise I forget. It's the same way in helping others...I know that the little things we do...the ordinary, everyday ways that we reach out and love...make a long-term difference for Christ's-sake in others but I like to see the results sometimes!

The Begining of a New School Year!

2011-09-13T11:15:00.001-05:00

September brings turning leaves, cooler temps, and fall wardrobes...WAIT! In Sierra Leone, September is the end of the rainy season and the temperature is warming up, daily! The sky turns beautiful colors over the ocean but the leaves remain the same. BUT new wardrobes come out in the form of school uniforms.

Ours are blue and white as you can see below; when driving through town I see uniforms of every color! I love the bright pink and brown of the school down the road and the reds and greens of others. One thing that becomes apparent now though is how many children are on the street when they should be in school. One of our children told us that her last school had 500 students in one class! Can you imagine teaching that?!?! Her teacher didn't show up most days.

Parents can't afford school fees or the uniform or the shoes or the book OR their children bring income into the family by selling or working on the street and they can't afford the loss of that. And even those that are priveledged to go to school can't expect a good education in overcrowded classrooms with underqualified teachers.

What is the future for a child that doesn't go to school? If they can't read or write they might still get a job but chances are their employer will rip them off in some ways. Without an education will they know enough not to take out a loan or make an agreement with someone who is trying to force them into slavery? And when they have children of their own, the cycle will simply repeat itself.

One thing that I have become aware of in new and fresh ways is how grateful I am for my education. I was priveledged to attend elementary-high school in a school where I had the right amount of attention from teachers. I had parents who never considered sending me out to get a job to support the family...they didn't need to consider it.

Our children at The Covering have this same opportunity; they recieve an education that is far better than most of the children of this country. You can see it in their smiles below. They love the chance to learn; I've never seen children so excited about booksd or so grateful for the chance to sit in a classroom.

I thought I'd share with you some pictures of the first days of school this school year at The Covering. Enjoy!

picts

2011-09-09T09:28:00.000-05:00

When the sun shines during the day....it makes the evening better too!

Another birthday lunch! No pizza for him, CHICKEN!

Fun with a bottle top and a string.

Happy...just happy.

More smiles!

I chased my motor car up and down, up and down, and now I am tired!

Day 12: THE SUN!

2011-09-07T14:16:00.000-05:00

It’s the rainy season and it feels as if it has been raining all day, EVERY day for years. No joke! It’s like MN in January and February when you don’t see the sun for long stretches of time and you believe it is there but you are known at times to doubt its existence. Okay I might be exaggerating a bit.

The sun came out today though and it felt so good. There’s no school this week so there were hours of fun outside in the sun! And because of the cooler temps it was a perfect day to play. They played balance ball, football, tag, and chased motorcars down the slop. I watched, enjoying the moments when someone would stop, come over to me and give me a hug or tell me a story or pull my hair. But mostly I enjoyed the sun!

Side note: It’s not MN COLD! They tell me it’s cold here but I would guess the temp to be 70F at the lowestJ

(September 5, 2011)

Day 9: J

2011-09-07T14:14:00.000-05:00

J. has been my constant companion these days.
He runs to me and throws his arms around me in the morning and 15 minutes later he is doing whatever he can to make me turn away from him. I have been intently seeking his attention for months now and I don’t know if he knows what to do with it.
He is not a small boy! One minute he’ll want to sit on my lap and the next he is pinching me and pushing me around. But this is it…I know that slowly and gently his heart is being changed. I know that this little-big boy who sobbed for over an hour in the office today is figuring out who he is when he is loved; his tears are healing. I told him today, as I squeezed him as tight as I could after he stole my phone, threatened to break my glasses, and pinched me so hard I almost started crying—that I love him (I also told him that I am not going to put up with his behavior so he needs to think about apologizing) and that always would…even if I’m not around to give him a squeeze!

(September 2, 2011)

Day 8: Sharing a Meal with others.

2011-09-07T14:12:00.002-05:00

Aunty M. has been on leave, a much needed rest between teams and 17 hour days. But I am a bit lost without her. I have been so spoiled while living in Salone. I haven’t had to cook for myself or worry about coming home after a day at the center and finding something to eat. I’ve dined on some of the best Chinese stir-fry ever, ground-nut stew that is heavenly, and chocolate cake (although I would never be allowed to eat just chocolate cake for dinner!) With my “Sierra Leone Mother” gone I’ve been fending for myself and gotten pretty good at noodles and laughing cow cheese!

However, the worst part is not my cooking—it’s eating alone. I don’t really care for it. And I can’t simply sit and enjoy a meal alone; I must find something else to do while eating! This has all lead to me eating lunch with the kids at the center occasionally. Tuesday’s are my favorite days because we have beans! Today though, it was crain-crain. Another green leaf mixed with palm oil, maggi, and pepper and boiled and put on top of rice. Honestly the food itself doesn’t bring much joy. Some days there is so much pepper in it my upper lip sweats and I wonder if I am going to make it through the bowl in front of me. But I’ve realized that the joy comes in sharing a meal with others. And didn’t Jesus say something about fellowshipping around a table? And Paul about eating with one another?

It seems somehow sacred to sit and share in the abundance of food that these precious children have begun taking for granted…they always say thank you…but I think that they are trusting that they will be provided for. That food is not something they need to worry about right now; they can be children and play and not starve. And they fight over which table I should sit at and which one gets to watch “the white man eat black food” and they claim that cassava is making my skin darker!

(September 1, 2011)

and again I say REJOICE.

2011-08-28T14:32:00.000-05:00

I am sorry for those of you who have not had the opportunity to experience worshiping with our kids at The Covering. It’s one of the most beautiful things you will ever participate in. I used to get caught up in the words…I lead worship for kids and wanted to make sure the songs were theologically correct and developmentally appropriate and all that…but now I don’t even know some of the words and I don’t worry one bit about it. This morning we sang a song where the main word is Bellow or Mellow or something else that rhymes with low and I love it! You sing that word, whatever it is, over and over and over along with a little hip action and hand waving and then you sing “see what the Lord has done!” I just have to laugh and trust that the Lord is honored by the intention of our hearts to praise him!

Here, there are no lyrics on a screen, no guitars or “mood” lighting, no prescribed set or timing (except we sing Praise a.k.a. fun and fast with louder drums first, and worship a.k.a. slow and prayerful last), no arguments over hymns or choruses or whatever, and no quality controls or standards! The only thing is that you should sing as loudly as possible and dance or clap or play your harmonica if you have one. I didn’t do such a good job of the clapping and singing loudly today…I found out about 1 minute before the service that I was giving the message for the morning! I remember being told that a pastor should always have a message ready in case they are called on but I didn’t have anything ready; it’s hard to sing loud when you are trying to figure out what to say. I finally just gave up, picked a verse I’d underlined in Thessalonians and “winged” it and enjoyed some loud singing!

I hear them now, a block away, singing praises and I am sure that God is smiling with me.

This, for me today is joy: witnessing and participating in the praises of children being lifted up to the Lord!

Joy and Meaning

2011-08-25T12:39:00.000-05:00

The strangeness of all of this is that 6 months ago I never thought I would make it this far…to actually STAY and live in Freetown for more than another day was CRAZINESS to me. But just over 12 months ago I thought I might just be moving to stay here forever—the glamorous life of a missionary was calling my name. And now, just over 2 months away from the time when I’ll leave this not so glamorous but not torturous season of my life, I am amazed that I made it here…and I don’t really know where here is but it’s where I am and where God is meeting me these days.

I have been reading a book…okay, I know some of you can’t imagine me NOT reading a book so that statement is really unnecessary; I don’t think I’ve been without a book to read since I learned to read which I’m sure was when I was 3 or 4 judging as to how brilliant I am. HA! Anyway, I digressed big time…I was challenged in this book today to make a list of things that bring joy and meaning to my life and compare them with the things that I would say are my goals. I don’t really have a goal list right now save a hot, clean shower and a big glass of ICE COLD MILK but I am going to work on the joy and meaning list. So I started this morning and didn’t get very far; it’s harder than I thought! I decided that I will “study” my life over the next few weeks and months and see what really brings me joy and makes “my heart sing”, and to keep myself accountable I’ll share some of these things with you on a some-what regular basis. I’m also praying that God will reveal through these things what He might be calling me to do in the next season.

Day One: Today I threw peanuts at William and Joseph! They snuck in the office, whispering and nudging each other like there was something BIG going on. They sneak in nearly everyday and just stand quietly or hang on someone. Seriously, it’s got to be the most boring place…imagine a 11 year old boy wanting to stand and watch 5 adults type! So today, when they walked in I grabbed some boiled peanuts (which DO NOT bring me joy of any kind, YUCK!) and attempted to start a food fight. Yesterday and lunch I wanted so badly to fling a spoonful of cassava and rice at the older boys. Just for fun but I was afraid they’d make me clean up the mess which would not be fun! The boys looked at me like I was the crazy white lady (nothing new) and picked up the peanuts and ate them; then they sat down in the chair next to my desk, and stared at me while I typed. I was disappointed that they didn’t start chucking peanuts back at me or laughing or screaming in outrage…they acted like it was just another day. Hmm…must do something crazier next time!

I won’t be putting “throwing peanuts at 11 year olds” on the list! Instead I’m thinking…doing the unexpected or acting like a child once in a while or getting kids to smile or maybe all threeJ

Rejoice always! 1 Thessalonians 5:16

a few pictures

2011-08-17T04:41:00.000-05:00

New friends.

Enjoying some ice cream!!!

The day the sun was shinning...

Big Sunday smiles.

Enjoying the new play room and the TOYS!

A Birthday lunch.

More toys and fun!

Silly fun.

Happy Home-coming.

I turned my back for a minute and the girls painted the boys nails!

change, NOW please!

2011-08-14T12:26:00.000-05:00

I was reading yesterday and came upon this phrase The slow and inefficientwork of God and what I heard in my spirit was the affirmation that often change doesn’t come in a moment. More often it comes through years, through decades, through lifetimes and it is slow and seemingly inefficient and irritating!

Deep change sometimes happens in an instant—in a moment of joy or terror-and our circumstances change and our heart and soul change to. These moments can define us and nothing will ever be the same again. Some of us come to faith in Christ that way, or at least we think we do, that moment in which everything changes; if you look back before that moment, often in hindsight you’ll see a gradual drawing towards change.
And I began to think and I’m going to share my wild questions and thoughts with you!

God made the world in 6 days and rested on the 7^th but what did he do on the 8^th day? And how long was it, how many days were there between that 7^th day and the day that Eve ate that fruit and convinced Adam to go along with it. Days where nothing big or miraculous or amazing happened—except Adam and Eve WALKED with GOD in the garden!?! And then there were just several hundreds of years between Adam and Noah where all the Bible records is births and ages…not much movement on God’s part. And Noah spends 100 years building a boat…Abraham takes a couple of decades to make it to Canaan…Israel stays in slavery for 400 years and wanders for 40…there were hundreds of years of silence between the prophecies of the Old Testament and the fulfillment in the new…and 2000 years later we are still waiting for the 2^nd coming of Christ…children continue to die everyday in this country because of poverty and after hundreds of years of development and missionaries and scientific discovery they are still waiting for something to change…and me most days I feel like I’m still stuck in the same places and the same fears and the same issues as 10 or 20 years ago; the circumstances may be different but the inside, the patterns and choices are often the same…and GOD moves slow.

And I would say He can be a bit inefficient too…couldn’t HE have made the world in 1 day if HE wanted to? Why take six? Did Noah have to build that boat by hand…couldn’t God have just made one appear? Did the Israelites need 400 years of slavery? Couldn’t God have knocked down the walls of Jericho the first time or the first day they marched? One sweeping move and Sierra Leone could be a country with plenty of food and resources to share? And me, wouldn’t it be better for everyone if God just changed me now?!? Is it just me or is that a bit irritating?

BUT He is always moving, always working, always present, and always refining us. There is a shifting, a restoration, a building, and a changing that is always moving the world towards the promise of HIS KINGDOM now and coming. Often it is like water flowing—the waves of the ocean or a river’s current—the single wave’s impact is usually not felt. The waves come and go all day long on the beach just down the hill from here and no one notices. But over time the sharp edges of rock and stone are worn away and what is left is smooth and new. Go to sandgrains.com under a microscope and you’ll see the beauty that the waves create over time.

Sometimes the waves are big and destructive; the change is massive and quick. Mostly the waves of change are gentle, graceful, and slow. I want God to change things NOW; to make me and the circumstances around me new and complete NOW and He gently says, “No, child, it might be slow, it will seem inefficient and irritating, it will be painful at times; but I am the author and perfector and only I know what the result will be and when and how the promise will be fulfilled.” And the waves of grace and change come over me and slowly, inefficiently, daily, and sometimes irritatingly I become...

2011-08-08T16:49:00.001-05:00

Today, I was harshly reminded of where I live. Children die
everyday…all over the world. In America, in England, and in Sierra
Leone; there is something different here, in Africa.

The news tells of THOUSANDS dying just east of here because of
famine, war, and injustice. And here, on the West Coast, children die
from things like malaria and typhoid…preventable and treatable, and
that most of us from the developed world take a pill or a shot for and
don't have to worry. Here children die from diarrhea and
malnourishment and COLDS. And it doesn't matter if it's a mother's
first child that she has waited and prayed for for years or the 13th
child of a father who has struggled to feed his children for
decades…IT HURTS.

Today I heard about a young mother of 2, who on Sunday went to church
and stayed afterwards to pray and fellowship and then she was gone.
Tomorrow I will call and find out if those children have a place to
go…if those babies have an aunty or a granny who will care for them
now. And if they are alone in this world? What will we do? The waiting
list is long and the needs are so great.

Today I went to the home of a man who has become a dear friend; one
whom I admire for his sacrifice to serve the children of his country.
In him I know the meaning of incarnational ministry…that "thing" that
they were always teaching us to strive for in Bible College—to be
Jesus…to "pitch a tent in the neighborhood" and live out the Gospel.
With his life He declares that Jesus loves the little children. This
man I have watched shed tears of sorrow over a home empty of children
and a longing to fill it; and then watched cry tears of JOY when God
blessed him with a son. A little boy, perfect in every way. And now,
just a few weeks later, before they even had time to hang pictures on
the wall, I heard him LAMENT and weep because that little blessing has
gone to live with his Heavenly Father.

And so we weep together, recognizing that we are not alone; that
David, Job, and Jesus—among many others—wept and lamented over the
suffering and the pain in this world. We weep and we pray—that God
would restore families; provide shelter, food and medicine for the
children and mothers and fathers of Sierra Leone; send to Africa the
things that we so take for granted…treatment for disease and doctors
who understand and food that brings life and strength; fill this house
and others like it with the laughter of children and bring back their
joy.

This from the Lord this morning...

"For the mountains may depart and the hills be removed, but my
steadfast love shall not depart from you, and my covenant of peace
shall not be removed, says the LORD, who has compassion on you."
Isaiah 54:10

"Therefore let those who suffer according to God's will entrust their
souls to a FAITHFUL Creator while doing good….And after you have
suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to
his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm,
strengthen, and establish you." 1 Peter 4:19 & 5:10

This from Him this night...
http://www.aholyexperience.com/

--
Cari Logan
adventuresinlistening.blogspot.com
therainingseason.org

2011-08-04T15:17:00.000-05:00

25 things that have happened since I last wrote…

1. I learned that if you smash a millipede/bug “you go piss”…from a 4 year old.

2. I piled 10 pre-teen boys in my car for a ride from here to the center…I don’t think there has EVER been that much joy in one place…they declared that it was their 3^rd blessing from Jesus of the day. WOW!

3. Sometimes having a whole group of men come to try to help you when your car doesn’t start is NOT helpful at all.

4. I rediscovered that I don’t like being told how to drive.

5. I LOVE fresh mango juice from Montana Garden.

6. I’m going to miss Joseph’s birthday…and he already knows itL

7. Mice don’t go away if you ignore them.

8. Everyone has left the guest house…it is officially me and the security guard!

9. Pinterest…I found it and I love it.

10. I’m terrified of going home because I will be starting over in so many ways…I’ve been looking up versed for the kids about being strong and courageous and without fear…maybe they are really for me.

11. I cannot go to the market without buying something…it’s as bad as Target.

12. I lost the exhaust on the side of the road 2x but I learned don’t worry, just pick it up and put it in the boot…or let someone else do it for youJ

13. I found out that the 2^nd time climbing the hill is much harder than the sixth.

14. I sat on the beach and got a tan; which was great until I realized that I’d have a really strange tan line…but I can fix that by sitting on the beach again!

15. 2 snakes were spotted in the compound…one is dead (THANK YOU KELVIN) and the other is hopefully hiding far, far away.

16. Pasta, potato, hotdogs and mayo do not really make a good cold salad…probably not warm either…but eating it for my hostess made her feel wonderful and that’s all that matters. (when she tries to open her own restaurant I’ll let her know she might not want to use that recipe again)

17. I’m losing ground on being grateful. Time to focus on that list again.

18. The rainy season is to blame for EVERYTHING in July and August. (the toilet doesn’t flush?…blame the rainy season!…the car doesn’t start?...it’s the rainy season!...no chocolate at the supermarket?...oh, the rain!...termites in the ceiling?...the RAIN!)

19. I was reminded that a broken heart is not easily mended…but it can be restored.

20. We discovered Crown Bakery Xpress…on this side of Freetown…and with it comes Honey Mustard Chicken Pasta Salad! YUM!

21. I received a gift of a handmade rag rug from a sweet, sweet girl and I will treasure it FOREVER.

22. I drove to Kissy! Through the middle of the craziness of downtown Freetown and the car made it over the worst road I have ever driven on.

23. I got new sunglasses…2 pairs…for $2 each! Bonus!

24. I was called Aunty Cari ½ a million times and it never gets old.

25. Grace.

Welcome Home

2011-06-23T03:45:00.000-05:00

In the last year...I've been here for over a year already! WOW!...I've had the opportunity to watch several children come into the center to join our TRS family there. We welcomed L. and M. who we asked God for the privilege of caring for for a long time before HE moved and brought them to us. Girls and boys keep coming to us...and although we've slowed down because of space and staffing, we still get to see God answer BIG prayers and bring new little ones here. On Tuesday we welcomed our newest family member; for me this may be the best one yet...

Last June, on my first visit to the Children's Hospital I met E.J. and have been asking the question...what can we do for E.J. ever since. She was abandoned at the hospital and had been living on one of the floors there for several years. The nurses were taking care of her as best as they could. We wanted to scoop her up that first day a year ago and bring her to the center but E.J. has special needs and we couldn't meet them at that time and we were experiencing some road blocks with another child abandoned there and didn't want to walk that same road with E.J. and end up loosing her to the system...AND God was whispering that dreaded 4 letter word...W.A.I.T.

So we visited her; gave her clothes and food and diapers. Every team that went to the Children's Hospital went to her floor and saw her...and then last week, I didn't go with the team to visit E.J.; when they arrived she was not there. She had been moved and it caused quite the commotion. The TRS staff that was along for the visit asked millions of questions and learned that she had been removed from the hospital and taken home but that the parents were unable to care for her and they needed help. At first glance it seemed like we were too late...we should have taken her in months ago...did we fail to listen to God? BUT then it became clear that this was God's movement...we didn't have to fight to get E.J. to our home...there was no one left to say "give me money and I'll give you the child"...she was moved to TRS at just the right time and in just the right way; I am OVERWHELMED at God's timing because we had all the things we needed to welcome her...things that we didn't have a year ago and some that we didn't even have a month ago.

We have space in a bedroom...a month ago she would have had to go into the babies room...and she's at least 9 years old!

We have caregivers ready to help her...a month ago we were short some staff.

When she came through the door on Tuesday afternoon I couldn't help but be amazed at our staff. The aunties surrounded her and started proclaiming how beautiful and wonderful she is. Uncle Daniel encouraged her over and over again that she was welcome her and we are glad to have her. Aunty Seray helped her bathe and found her clothes that fit and shoes! And then there were her new brothers and sisters; she was loved and accepted immediately. They held her hands and showed her all over the center...they asked her question and didn't mind that she didn't answer...they just loved on her and they will continue to love on her!

I see E.J. where she needs to be and I ask God...what about the others...what about the one who has been trafficked? or the 13 year old who has decided that soccer is more important than school and dropped out? what about the man who dreams of finishing college but doesn't have the funds so he asks the stranger that walks past his house everyday? what about the girl whose mother named her Mohamed to trick the devil into thinking she is a boy? what about the others who are sick in the hospital with little or no treatment? what about the mother who just lost her 3 year old? And he whispers that dreaded 4 letter word W.A.I.T. ...know that I am God and I am at work...these are MY children...I will rescue them, in MY way, in MY time, and for MY glory...

So for me today, I will REJOICE that E.J. is here among us and marvel at HIS goodness and care of HIS children.

A few...

2011-06-13T06:30:00.000-05:00

Here's a few photos from the last couple of weeks...just to show you that we are still here...and still having FUN!

Just a little camera fun:)

They LOVE coming into the office to visit.

Helping to fix the roof on this house.

These boys from the community sang me a horrible rap song; I enjoyed it anyway!

Just keep smiling!

ROCK STAR!

More camera fun!

Create...

2011-06-10T10:56:00.000-05:00

Check out the creativity...

these 2 precious boys took apart another toy...

used the cables and a battery and a candy wrapper....

and made a mini fan...

LOVE IT!

It always amazes me what children can do with their imagination and creativity when there is nothing else to play with! The last few weeks EVERYONE has been playing a game with stones...I first learned it in Haiti...a long time ago! I wasn't good at it then...I'm worse now! Especially compared with the older girls!

this one's for Kj

2011-06-06T05:45:00.000-05:00

Kj...this is the newest bug I've discovered, at first I thought it was a big piece of ash from the coal fire. Also, I had a chicken in the house this morning...I was sitting eating breakfast and she just about sat on my feet:)

Deuteronomy 33:12

2011-06-04T06:06:00.000-05:00

I've found myself "popo"ing a lot of children recently! For them it is the most relaxing, secured, and comforting place they can be...most of them spent HOURS, DAYS, MONTHS in this position with their mammas or aunties...they LOVE it!

Yesterday, I came across this...
“Let the beloved of the LORD rest secure in him, and the one the LORD loves rests between his shoulders.” Deuteronomy 33:12

LORD, popo me today and everyday!

Joy!?!

2011-05-27T15:15:00.000-05:00

I hear the kids singing tonight…I haven't sat and listened to them in the evening for several weeks. I haven't had time to stop and just enjoy…I've been thinking about JOY this evening…I don't have enough of it…

stress…I've got that

urgency…check

disappointment…yup

when i look at the world around me it's hard to see past the garbage, the sin, the injustice and remember that God is good.

I hear people say all the time that Africa…this place I live in…breaks them. Leaves them with a heart that is broken for the world and changes them to do something about it…but how do you live with that broken heart EVERYDAY…are we supposed to? OR does God actually call us to something bigger…does he call us to HOPE & JOY…LIFE IN ABUNDANCE! And where does that joy come from in a world filled with pain…a world in which I tend to focus on the negative, the hurt, the trauma, the abuse, the evil instead of seeing the KINGDOM coming to earth. I want to see God's hand first, before I notice where He still needs to move because then…maybe, just maybe…I'll remember that He is already moving in those places…that all is not lost and that all I need to do is take one step at a time and HE is always there to pick me up when I fall down…

So I decided to look up joy in the Bible and here's what I found: WOW!

1 Chronicles 29:17
I know, my God, that you examine our hearts and rejoice when you find integrity there. You know I have done all this with good motives, and I have watched your people offer their gifts willingly and joyously.

Job 8:21
He will once again fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy.

Psalm 16:11
You will show me the way of life,granting me the joy of your presenceand the pleasures of living with you forever.

Psalm 20:5
May we shout for joy when we hear of your victoryand raise a victory banner in the name of our God.May the Lord answer all your prayers.

Psalm 22:26
The poor will eat and be satisfied.All who seek the Lord will praise him.Their hearts will rejoice with everlasting joy.

Psalm 34:5
Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy;no shadow of shame will darken their faces.

And there is soooooo much more!

Here's some joyous pictures of the last few weeks as well.

I snuck into preschool one day...we've got new chairs (pictured here) and new tables (I'll have to sneak in again this week and get a picture of those! Love these little ones!!!

A new bedroom is being built and tomorrow is moving day! Yeah!

We went to the beach...and this is how we felt about it! JOY!

Baby Cari got some special attention...she's 6 months old now!

We had visitors!

A PARTY FOR LUCY!

A goodbye and a handing over from one momma to the next...God is so good! We miss our Lucy but we love hearing the updates about how well she is doing in her new home!

Blessing or Curse?

2011-05-16T16:10:00.000-05:00

Something has been bothering me today…there is a story for everything in the Bible…and sometimes honestly I get confused…by the way people use the stories and by how I use them too.

This morning we read from Joel…you know the book about locusts…and poverty became a plague and our blessings (of wealth, success, and health) became what the locust ate…and our obedience became the key to God restoring these things to us…and I wondered anew at why there is poverty and sickness and failure…and why a God who can use JOY as well as PAIN to teach us would chose to use pain more often…why do the people of Sierra Leone suffer so? is poverty a plague? and why does it make me angry to hear these dear friends tell me over and over that they are cursed because of their lack of wealth...that they suffer terribly...that I can't possibly understand heartache and lost because I have never lived their life of poverty...maybe they are right. Maybe poverty and failure and sickness are the worst sufferings imaginable and God is waiting to take it all away tomorrow if we just pray harder and have a bit more faith...but what if they are wrong? What if God's blessings come in different forms for different people...what if?

Jabez prayed and it seems from his short minute of Biblical fame he got what he asked for…wealth and increase…Hosea prayed and his wife continued to be a prostitute and he continued to live with a broken heart…Moses' mom gave him up for "adoption" and Ishmael's mom fought for him by running away with him to keep him safe…Ruth stayed with her mother-in-law and remained loyal to her family but Esther spent years denying her family ties…

I've been thinking…and I might be totally wrong…that it's not really about "pegging" God…saying this story proves that in this situation this will happen…it's more about revealing that God is intensely personal…he deals with us each in a personal way…that from these stories we can learn to trust that when we invite God into our story HE will make something beautiful from it…

So, for some poverty is a plague, I can't deny that millions suffer daily simply because they don't have enough money to buy food and medicine and that I pray that God and the CHURCH will step up and intervene on the behalf of the poor and opressed…For some wealth is a curse as it keeps them in bondage to the material world and they ignore the emptiness of their soul...

I have met some incredible people to whom God has not given wealth or provided a way out of poverty…but he has PROVIDED a faith that is strong, a determination that life is bigger than what happens here on this earth, and a total reliance on God and not self…I know OBEDIENT people who live without worldly possession and I know that God is a personal God…he knows each of our names and what we need and our obedience doesn't "restore" wealth or success or health but brings HIS riches of grace, HIS approval and presence in who we are and what we do, and HIS breath of life that measures our days and counts them before we are born.

Oh, that we could all learn that what we have or do not have is NOT a curse OR a blessing…it is simply, when we are willing, what God will use to shape us into the people He wants us to be and it might just be about perspective…the curse is living without seeing God's hand in it and allowing the enemy to use what we have or don't have to bring death and destruction into our lives…the blessing is placing it all in God's hands and somehow being able to say…like Shadrach, Meschak, and Abednego (Cari Logan translation and name spelling:) "If God saves us, GREAT…if not GREAT…HE IS STILL GOD AND WE WILL STILL TRUST HIM!"

The Events

2011-05-12T11:23:00.000-05:00

The last 2 weeks have been full of FUN...and adventures in listening! As usual there are a thousand things going on! Here's a few pictures.

Sunday morning fun:)

Our feet are beautiful!

Painting and new shirts!

Moses, Lucy, Duncan, Aunty Esther, and I went to the beach!

Hannah...

Study Time!

Birthday Treats!

Moms

2011-05-08T10:43:00.002-05:00

Last week I took one of our teen moms and her 5 month old to the clinic to get her 5 month baby shots. We sat in the waiting room for about and hour and I watched the mothers come and go with their infants. One precious mom sat down next to me with TWINS! Seeing twins is a big deal in Sierra Leone and there were many watching her. The babies were about 2 months old and I could immediately tell that she was tired. Women kept coming up to her and asking questions about the babies and telling her to "bear up"…they all understood the difficulty of giving birth and caring for 2 babies in a country where life is difficult. This sweet mother walked a distance to the clinic with one child on her back and one carried in front. I'm sure that she hopes and prays every night that her children won't be a part of the statistic of 1 in 5 that die before the age of 5 but she knows that with 2 the chances of losing one or both grow exponentially. As she stood up to get ready to strap one baby on her back, he almost fell off, and as I reached up to steady him and another reached over to take the girl baby from her so she could properly "popo" her child I felt the overwhelming need to pray for her and join her in the call to God to save her children.

I have lived in this home with these teen moms for 5 months now and have had an extra glimpse into the struggle of motherhood in Sierra Leone. Getting up VERY early to fetch water…carrying 5 gallon pails of water on your head up the hill…washing children and laundry out of those buckets and finding that there is none left for yourself unless you go back and carry some more…cooking meals over an open fire…struggling to go to the market…riding a motorcycle with your infant (NO safety seats or laws here)…struggling to bring in a small amount of income to feed your babies…watching your children sick and not knowing what to do…daily contemplating if it's worth it…is there any hope for your children….can you really offer them what they need?

One of them has been telling me all week, "my heart hurts for my children…what can I do?" She has a physical ache that is there because of love and longing…a desire to give them all that they need and long for, to give them hope and a future…and a realization that she cannot. And all of us must come to the point of realizing that WE cannot give a hope and a future to our children…only GOD has the ability to do that…and we must lay our children at the foot of the CROSS and ask the LORD to meet their needs, longings, and desires in his way…BUT what happens when laying your babies in the LORD'S hands means physically giving them away?

I think of Mose's mother and the heartbreak of leaving her child in a basket because she could not save him any other way but to give him up…and my heart aches and is amazed at God's salvation…her sacrifice, her giving him up opened the door for God to save a nation…and there is great hope in that.

And today, I'm thinking of my own momma. I miss her mother daily…she has been the BEST mother and from her I know the gift of motherhood…the giving up of oneself to serve and love another…over the past year I left her and moved thousands of miles away and instead of clinging and holding me tight…she once again placed her hope and trust in GOD the Father and let me go…more than that she encouraged, sacrificed, and gave so that I might live out this piece of God's call on my life. She has taught me to live in GRACE and SERVICE.

Mom, when you read this…know that I LOVE YOU! I am always and forever grateful for you and I miss you like crazy! Thank you for being my mom for the last 31 years and for all that you are. Love you!

Song of the Beautiful

2011-04-28T10:54:00.000-05:00

Today was another holiday...we like to celebrate in Sierra Leone:) And a holiday = no school so as promised I took 4 of the older girls out...they helped me go to the grocery store to buy coke for Aunty Erica and they picked out Oreos and Crunch n' Munch for themselves. We drove to the closest beach and ate and talked and played. They got to watch a young man try to get me to be his "friend"...I'm not joking...he told me he wanted to take me to the club on Friday...when i said no...he asked if I wanted to run on the beach with him on Saturday "you're fat and if you're lazy the fat will take over"...NOT the best pick up line and I considered slapping him but instead chose to tell him I would not give him my phone number and I would never see him again (is that what Jesus would do? I'm just not sure.)...anyway I hope the girls learned that you can politely say no and I will be forgiven for laughing at the poor boy all day. It was a good opportunity for us to talk about boys...and laugh!

When we got back to the Guest House the girls dressed up and answered some questions for me...here's what they shared:

R.(11 years)--Before I came to TRS I lived in Waterloo in a pink and green house with 10 rooms and lots of family. I lived with my mama, papa, 4 sisters named Fatmata, 6 brothers, Uncles, and Aunties. Some of them are dead now but I remember Aunty Marie, Mariatu, and Mariama. I went to school but after school I went to the market to help sell cement. I also helped to cook and sell food. What I like best about TRS is that I get to go to school, eat 3 or 4 times a day, have rest time everyday in the afternoon, and my aunties. I thank God for making me to see this wonderful day and brining me to TRS. When I grow up I want to be the President of Sierra Leone and I want to help people by sharing food with them. I want to tell my sponsors: I love you!

F.-- I am 14 years old and before I came to TRS I lived in Kenema and Freetown. I lived in a fine place with 1 room and 4 other people. I have 1 sister and 1 brother and they are both at TRS with me. I went to school and my job was to fetch water for my family. I am at TRS because God brought me here and I am grateful to Him for that and that I get to talk on the computer to my sponsors. The best thing about TRS is that I get to go to school and when I grow up I want to be an accountant and a bank manager. I dream of helping children by sharing money with them. I want to tell my sponsors that the Lord will bless them.

I.--(11 years) Before TRS I lived in Goedrich; my home had 1 room and parlor and there were 6 of us living there. I went to school but after class I had to go to the market to sell potato leaves to help my family. It is because of God's grace that I came to live at TRS where I eat 3 times a day, have aunties to care for me, and I have sponsors. I thank God because I get to go to school. When I grow up I want to be a bank manager and help people that don't have enough. I pray for my sponsors that God will bless them and protect them from danger.

B.--I am 11 years old and before TRS I lived in AllenTown at the Network; when I was there there were 98 people living with me. I went to school there; God brought me to TRS and I am grateful! I love TRS because I get to eat good food everyday, pray everyday, and go to school. I am thankful to God because I am here and I have sponsors and aunties and uncles. When I grow up I want to be a nurse and work with children. I also dream about being a pastor. I want to tell my sponsors I love you and God will bless you!

These girls are absolutely beautiful! Whenever I hear the "Song of the Beautiful" (Christy Nockels) I think of them and the work that God is doing in their precious lives.

The broken, weary and poor
Finding...You are the cure
The weak and dying, glorifying, You in it all...

It's the song of the beautiful, Jesus Loves Me...
It's the song of the beautiful, Jesus Saved Me...
The song of the redeemed, the echoes of those made free,
It's the song of the beautiful, Jesus Loves Me...

The fallen back on their feet
The fatherless now complete...
The innocent suffering, rising from wounding, to find...You were there all along!

It's the song of the beautiful, Jesus Loves Me...
It's the song of the beautiful, Jesus Saved Me...
The song of the redeemed, the echoes of those made free -
It's the song of the beautiful, Jesus Loves Me...

Oh how He loves me
Oh how He loves me
Oh how He love me...
The broken, the beautiful....

The prodigal running home...

The widow never alone...

The one who is waiting, rising and singing, "You...Jesus, You Are My All!"

Independence Day

2011-04-26T14:41:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow is the official 50th Anniversary of Independence for Sierra Leone...but TODAY the celebration was at TRS! We invited the neighborhood, got some entertainment, and cooked up a feast! Here's a few pictures of the hundreds I took today!

Pre-Party Jump for Joy!

Green and White and Blue!

A quick visit to Pa Kabbah (the former President of Sierra Leone and our neighbor!)

I wore my new dress in honor of the day:)

TRS kids gave up their chairs for the community...I was so proud of them today!

The Cotton Tree Kids came and sang for us.

TRS kids performed too!

And danced!

And danced some more!

The neighbors lined up to eat FIRST.

The Freetown Players came and shared with us. AMAZING acapella group; they sang about Freetown, Sierra Leone, Child Rights, and History.

I will boast in Jesus Christ

2011-04-23T04:29:00.000-05:00

I ate a hershey bar for breakfast…it was supposed to be my Easter treat…but this morning I needed it.

In every culture, every nation, and every family there are stories and beliefs that bring life…that encourage us to persevere, to show love, to serve others and live without selfishness, and to "be a good citizen"…and then there are the stories that bring death and confusion…the superstitions, the stories that encourage us to but others down so that we can be elevated, to fear other people, and its all fate or its all me.

I am speaking of things that I don't really understand and I am not sure if my interpretation of them is correct but I have made some observations this week. Early in the week there was a gathering of important people in Bo-Town and for entertainment they brought in several comedian groups and staged a competition. One group won, and the leader of the group died shortly after. My friends were sad about this death, lamenting that it wasn't right, all he did was make people laugh and now he's dead…how could they have done that?…I immediately thought he must have been murdered…so I asked, how did he die? I was told the occult men put a curse on him; they'd been asked by the group that lost to curse him for winning…is that murder? is that real? does it happen often?

This conversation lead to my understanding that some of my friends here believe that if they succeed the will be attacked, persecuted, and cursed. That getting good grades in school could mean the family of the other child seek to harm you spiritually. Then I was told that for them to spend time with "white people" (ME) and be known to be receiving support from us, then they are targeted even more. People want what they have. And I wonder why anyone would want to succeed if that means that those around you will seek your distraction.

They go to the occult men or a family member who is in a secret society and seek what someone else has…money, connections, power, etc…and are told to get that they must sacrifice something else.

Christians pray and when God doesn't answer their prayers or give them what they ask for they look somewhere else…here it is acceptable to "trust" in Christ for healing and life AND to ask the witchdoctor for help too…(in America we don't turn to the occult for help BUT we have our stumbling blocks too…it is easy to trust in Christ AND_____ um, chocolate?!?)

All this has been rolling around in my head and then something terrible happened. One of my friends was attacked…not physically although there were signs of that too…but spiritually. She received what some here call a witch slap…and she suffered. She came home aggressive, speaking gibberish, and scared. She lost nearly 2 days of life that she cannot remember anything, we don't know where she was or what she did for 12 hours of that time….And we prayed and fought and prayed for hours…and when she was again able to speak the name of JESUS all she could tell us really was that she had been slapped…that someone wanted to control her, destroy her, take away her opportunity, or use her connection to the white people for their own.

I don't understand all that has happened over the last week. Yesterday I saw the power of the name of Jesus; I felt the overwhelming love of a Father who would send his son to die so that we might be

FREE of what torments us…

FREE of what brings us shame…

FREE from superstitions and stories that bring death not life…

FREE from the schemes of the enemy.

But I also saw that freedom, belief in Jesus to SAVE, and LIFE come at a price…for us the price was sleep, saying NO to other ways of "salvation" and offending family members, and standing in the path of the enemy and receiving a few wounds of our own.

And Good Friday, for me, will always contain this story…of the power of the NAME OF JESUS to save…of the enemy believing that he had won and defeated Christ…of waiting and watching for Christ to triumph…and we still wait for final triumph in this battle too; my friend is sleeping a deep rest but when she is awake there is still confusion and lostness…but I believe in the power of not just the CROSS but also the RESURRECTION…and tomorrow as we celebrate the victory of Christ over the grave…I believe that we will also be celebrating the victory of Christ over the enemy and the schemes of those who seek to destroy…and this beautiful, young woman will be restored mind, body, and soul...that she will carry the scars of this battle BUT she will not carry ANY shame and through this what seemed like defeat, she will be TRANSFORMED and that which was meant for evil will ultimately be used for good.

Song has played a large part in this…every night we sing and pray together and the songs that we sing were the ones that we used as we prayed and fought and cried out to Jesus for rescue…they soothed and comforted, encouraged and bolstered, and gave hope…the words of this one came back to me yesterday…I learned this song 11 years ago on a trip that God used to change my life…they are still as powerful today as they were then…

How deep the Father's love for us

How vast beyond all measure

That He would give His only Son

To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss

The Father turns His face away

As wounds which mar the chosen One

Bring many sons to glory

Behold the Man upon a cross

My guilt upon His shoulders

Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice

Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that held Him there

Until it was accomplished

His dying breath has brought me life

I know that it is finished

I will not boast in anything

No gifts, no powr's, no wisdom

But I will boast in Jesus Christ

His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward?

I cannot give an answer

But this I know with all my heart

His wounds have paid my ransom

No waste

2011-04-21T10:32:00.000-05:00

It's cleaning day again on Saturday...and I will tell you that it is NOT a joke! If you leave your house and are caught on the street you will be forced to clean someone else's yard or the street and it's possible you could even be arrested. Every good citizen of Sierra Leone will do their part to clean and prepare for the 50th Celebration next week. As for me, I'll be sleeping in!

We've already had several Cleaning Saturday's and there is much less waste on the streets!

I'm realizing that there is no wast in God's Kingdom, no garbage on the streets...everyday is a cleaning day:) and God doesn't waste a moment and this ache is real but it's preparing me for something better than I can imagine. This morning I was reminded that we often only listen to God's will when He wants us to do something we want...it's harder to listen when He asks us to do something we don't want...and then when we do what He asks, and it isn't exactly what we expected it is even harder!
This song (and the WHOLE album by Charlie Hall called The Bright Sadness) is brining sanity and clarity today...

My Brightness
Well, I've been hit from every corner
And I've been thrown from side to side
And thm cracks up on the inside
So I come to You for life

Your presence always heals me
So I wanna drink it in
You know where we're going, God
And You know where I've been

And your love is like a rock when I'm spinning
Your love is like a rock, when I'm spinning
Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning around

Yesterday I felt so angry
And today so insecure
And I hate it that I wrestle
With the God that I adore

Your presence always heals me
So I wanna drink it in
You know where we're going, God
And You know where I've been

And Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning
Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning
Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning

And I know less about You
But my heart loves You so much more
You're the bright in sadness
You're my brightness

I wish this thing could pass from me
But I'm wanting what You want
So bring me high or bring me low
Just hold me in Your love

And Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning
Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning
Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning
Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning

Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning
Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning
Your love is like a rock when I'm spinning around

Green and White and Blue

2011-04-19T15:00:00.000-05:00

So next week Sierra Leone celebrates 50 years of Independence from England and today and tomorrow our children are going out to visit some historical and important sites in Freetown. I wish I could share all the historical information I gathered today but I can't…seriously, it was so HOT that the wax in my ears boiled and I heard nothing…I took a lot of pictures though…

Baby Cari LOVE Sierra Leone! (She did not get to go on the trip:(

Ready to go! One Poda for boys & one for girls.

First Stop: Fourbay College...the University of Sierra Leone!

Just in case you get lost and need to find your way back to Freetown...

The steps to the ampitheater, where granduations happen. I PROMISED the children that if they graduate from this college, I WILL come to their graduation!

John F. Kennedy...they asked me if I knew him...um, not personally...I guess he sent money for the school...

Second Stop: Parliament, public gallery

Future Parliamentarians...you have to be 30...but wait someday they just might have a seat here!

Aunties and Uncles who work hard enough to be Parliamentarians...I'd vote for them.

This is for all of you who still have your Christmas Tree up...so does the Government of Sierra Leone so don't feel bad:)

Third Stop: The Peace and Cultural Monument

It's next to THE Cotton Tree...the center of Freetown

Did you see the movie?

Some important people....

Peace and Justice for all.

This Sierra Leonean is just too cute!

A.

2011-04-18T13:57:00.000-05:00

Today I talked with the very first resident of The Covering…our first lady…and the first thing I discovered is that I've been calling her by the wrong name all this time! I learned long ago that one should always ask a child what he or she wants to be called…I forgot in her case until today and discovered something new! (I struggled the rest of my time with her to use the "right" name! ug!)

She is a beautiful 10 year old who has a favorite dress that is white (or was white once) with pink flowers. Hugs are always a part of every interaction with her…she gives the best squeezes. She is quiet and gracious but very strong and often demanding…these are qualities that will serve her well some day!

She shared with me that she came to TRS because her family wanted her to have the chance to go to school, something they could not provide for her; her house was too small for all the people that lived there. Her favorite thing about TRS is school and she likes gym class best. The thing she thanks God for is that she sleeps well at night. She told me that she is very good at prayer and that makes her special. She wants to be a nurse when she grows up and she also loves to sweep:) and someday she would like to see a giraffe!

If she could say one thing to all of you who are reading this, she would tell you about God, who is Spirit, who gives us wisdom and who loves us!

Aunty Alice aka HM

2011-04-16T16:53:00.000-05:00

Aunty Alice

I'm without notes from my reporter-friend, so I get to share with you about Aunty Alice on my own. Aunty Alice moved into the basement of the Guest House in January with her youngest son Daniel (4 years). She is a strong woman and we asked her to come and minister to our teen moms and help them to care for their children. I went to the other aunties at the center and asked them, "who can handle teenage girls?" She was the immediate answer…she's uncompromising but full of love for them.

Aunty Alice has many children. Some are her own biological children; some she has adopted and others she has pulled from the streets and nursed back to health and the Lord. To come and stay with our girls she left a 10 year-old daughter with other family members to finish school. Gifting is her name and she is a beautiful, intelligent child.

A while back Aunty started talking about giving these teen moms practical and creative skills so that they would learn to use their hands and have something to sell. After some loving donations, they now have their own sewing machine and another aunty coming in to teach them how to sew. Today they have been learning to tie-dye, or gar as it is called here. Here are some pictures! The finished products will be for sale and be used to help these moms buy more materials, contribute to the cost of feeding and clothing themselves and their children, and create a savings for them to take wherever God calls them next.

Every night Aunty leads us in prayer and praise and we never go to bed without being reminded that God hears our cries and that to truly follow Jesus we must give him our whole life…and she recites Psalm 121 to us all

I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.
2My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth.

3He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber.

4Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep.

5The LORD is thy keeper: the LORD is thy shade upon thy right hand.

6The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night.

7The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul.

8The LORD shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.

TV face happens EVERYWHERE!

2011-04-15T12:51:00.000-05:00

Today I learned that if we want to cut the food budget at the center (It cost a lot of feed 90 children 4x a day!) we should install TVs in the dinning room! No joke…this is what will happen…

and no one will have time to eat:)

These two turned 12 and 13 this month so as promised to all 12+ year olds, I took them out for pizza at Mamba Point…this is a TOTALLY selfish thing as I am the one who wants pizza…They did eventually manage to eat and they liked it! I also finally got them to answer 2 questions…what was the best thing that happened to you last year and what do you want to happen this year…they both said, "coming for pizza today" and "coming for pizza again"!…there are 2 girls turning 12 next month…yeah pizza (and next time we are going to sit away from the TV)

The HILL!

2011-04-13T10:10:00.000-05:00

I recognized something today…I was standing at the bottom of the hill dreading my climb to the top…wondering if I should be brave and pay a motorcycle 1000 to take me to the top (wouldn't that also be EXTREMELY lazy and a waste of $.25)…and watching two of our older children climb in front of me. I have the same debate with myself every day…is it better to walk up as fast as possible and just get it over with or to walk up slowly…either way I end up tired and SWEATY by the time I reach the top! But as I watched these two children walk up the hill the way most Sierra Leoneans do…a slow zigzag…constantly moving from one side of the road to the other…I had 3 thoughts…1st they are making the hill 4x as long as it is…and they are REALLY smart…and this is a clear picture of our cultural differences.

I don't want to be too simplistic but hear me out…I'm an American, I do things right away, as quickly as possible, and my main goal is to "get r' done". I will march straight up the hill, while carrying my laptop, loaded purse, and extra large planner all while talking on my cell phone and complaining that it's hot and the hill is too much! I approach life with an attitude of urgency and high productivity being the answer. My Sierra Leonean friends enjoy (maybe enjoy is not the right word) their walk up the hill…they talk to each other while walking and carrying their load. They meander a bit and eventually make it to the top…as do I but I am OUT of breath, sweating like crazy and cranky…they are in total control of their breath and pleasantly warm and ready to walk up hills 7x as big.

And they can walk up a hill with a 5 gallon bucket filled with water on their head! AMAZING! Which means they are not lazy…just patient, strong, and survivors. Me I don't feel like much of a survivor most of the times…I freak out when it comes to bugs (THERE WAS A GINORMOUS SPIDER IN THE PARLOR YESTERDAY!!! PUKE, PUKE, PUKE!) and lizards in my shower. I couldn't even lift off the ground much less put it over my head and carry it up the hill. I feel a great deal of humility when the 7 year olds at the center go and fetch gallons of water and I sit at home and wait for it to be delivered!

And I can live without water…but the HILL…my new prayer will be...

Please, Lord, give us an escalator…I will still "walk" up it…people who stand still on escalators are CRAZY…oh, and while you are working on getting me an escalator, can you make sure it runs on batteries or solar power, never needs maintenance and is lizard friendly (meaning I don't want those poor little creatures to get chopped up into little bitty pieces, eww); I am an American after all. Thanks, Love Cari.

Deh...The Best Behaved Boy at the Center

2011-04-12T13:01:00.000-05:00

On Sunday, Pastor Daniel called up one of the boys and declared to everyone that he was the best behaved child in the whole center. He is a quiet child, honestly, I don't think I met him until I had been here several months:) but he is very obedient and helpful. Last week found him cleaning up after all this brothers and sisters without being asked. He is usually the first to stack chairs after service and enjoys sweeping the floor if he has a broom! So, as a reward for his good behavior he was recognized in church and given some biscuits (which he sat down and ate RIGHT away, I think he was afraid of having to be nice and share if any were left at the end of service); and I told him I was going to tell all of America about him in my blog (I recognize that this was a bit of a stretch, as not ALL of America reads my blog, but the important people do:)

I'd like to take this opportunity to introduce you to the boy I've nicknamed Deh…

He was born in Shenge in a village called Mokombetti (didn't spell that correctly for sure) and he has 2 brothers living with him now at TRS…he's the oldest of the three. Deh is 6 years old and was born in October. He remembers his village as having lots of mangos, which he loves, and that there he slept on the ground in a 3 room house that 36 people shared. He never got to eat 4x a day like he does at TRS but he did go to school. His parents were farmers and they grew cassava and potatoes. He helped them sometimes on the farm.

I asked him what he likes best about living at The Covering and he said EVERYTHING! When he prays he tells God thank you for his family, his sponsors, and that he can be together with his brothers at TRS. I asked him what he wants to be when he grows up and he responded…LIKE JESUS! and a teacher (like Jesus!). I also asked what he would like his sponsors to know and he said "My family is poor. I love God. Thank you!"

Birthday Party

2011-04-09T14:27:00.000-05:00

Today Aunty Marie baked cakes and helped us have a WONDERFUL Birthday Party for all those who were born in January, February and March! Here's some pictures of our fun...

What a difference...

2011-04-08T14:02:00.000-05:00

I was reading about the disaster in Japan today..."In the end, this reality about the aftermath of natural disasters should remind us of the limitations of GDP as a measure: it tells us what happens to output, to economic activity, but tells us NOTHING about welfare and happiness." At first glance that's a DUH! but we all spend a lot of time equating money with happiness and welfare with material things. I am sure that our children have been transformed because they have found themselves in a place where there is enough money to ensure that their bellies are full and they are healthy...that there is material things to enjoy BUT the real transformation comes not from that but from being surrounded by aunties and uncles and pastors and leaders who love them and show them who Jesus is!

I have been working on organizing and tagging all the pictures of the children I've taken since June! It is taking forever! One thing I have been struck by is how much they have changed...and I'm not just talking the growing up and getting bigger part...it's the fullness of once hollow cheeks...the glow in healthy skin and hair...and the joy! I want to share with you some of the pictures of this transformation...including some pictures of the baptisms that took place last month. Last Sunday, those who were baptized celebrated communion together for the first time...what a joy to be a part of these special moments in their lives!

This precious 9 year old has only been with us for a month!

Chickens, Weight Loss, & Near Misses

2011-04-07T14:57:00.000-05:00

No, I am not selling a miraculous weight loss drug! If you really want to get rid of some extra pounds, move to Sierra Leone! You can eat whatever you want and climb this hill 2 or 3 times a day and you'll be good to go!

The name of the game this week has been avoidance…or near misses! I nearly put my car into a big, deep hole…but I missed it! I almost hit a goat or a dog (honestly it was a blur and I'm not sure what kind of animal it was and I only zoned out while driving for a split second) while driving home from the beach yesterday! And I was millimeters from smashing a young man between my car and a poda poda on Sunday night…oops! (why do these all involve driving!?!?)

Tuesday, I nearly stepped in an enormous pile of black sludge (aka poo) and garbage that someone had dug out of the gutter only to leave in a pile on the side of the road…right next to the gutter that it ended up being shoved back into by the end of the day!

And I nearly got attacked by a rooster. NOT KIDDING! One of the visitors mistakenly told the children to catch the rooster for him, not thinking they'd actually be able to…they caught the rooster (quite quickly) and brought it to him…he screamed, thus making all the children aware that if you shove a chicken in our faces we freak out a bit…The conversation after that went something like this: silly Americans, don't you have chickens in your country?…um, OURS come from the frozen food section of the grocery store, thank you very much!…SO the child-with-chicken-chasing-the-big-American-man saga continued until he climbed into my car…at which point the chicken was shoved inside along with him. Then, I screamed and freaked out a bit…I spent several summers as a child helping the family "prepare" chickens to freeze so I am not afraid of the things…but a rooster, IN MY CAR, was too much. I screamed like a girl…but it could have pecked my eyes out!

So, I've been thinking about near misses…and wondering, how many times does God protect me from things each day? I'm sure it's not His deal too much whether or not I get a rooster shoved in my car; but I know He cares whether or not I get hurt…I am under his care, under his protection…and this morning I was reading in 1 Peter…that the trials and troubles we face are for him to test us and bring him glory…so some come into our lives but no more that He allows…the rest He protects us from. How many times a day or a week does He, lovingly keep my foot from stumbling on a rock and breaking my leg? or move and obstacle out of my way before I've ever seen it? or get rid of a pile of "poo" before I step into it? So today I'm saying THANK YOU Jesus…for saving me from all kinds of trouble…and for giving me enough trouble to test my faith and see who and what I'm really made of.

AND THANK YOU Jesus for saving me from that rooster…the thing had murder in it's eyes…I'm sure for him it was eat or be eaten…and he will be eaten soon…in fact, we had chicken for dinner tonight…yum!

And here's a few pictures from the week!

Cari Accounts Have Been Compromised...

2011-04-06T13:41:00.000-05:00

Hey Everyone!

This is actually Tina posting for Cari. Her email account and blog was hacked into by someone so if you received a recent email from her or saw the post yesterday about "Acai Berry"please know that this was not from Cari. If you are trying to email her, she may still need a day or two to get her email account straightened out.

Thanks for understanding,

Tina Schmidt

2011-04-04T09:47:00.001-05:00

A Brief Story about Aunty P. (a cook)

This was what she said: "I have 4 children and I live in Grassfield. The food I like best is leaves and rice and my favorite color is pink. The thing I enjoy most about my job at TRS is when I give food to the children and I also have some skills that I do not use at TRS because I am not here for them,my area is to cook for the children but these are the things…soap making and tailoring. The year I came to know Christ was in 1996." Sam

Aunty P. as she is known by the children is everyone's favorite! She makes the delicious food that they eat everyday! She also loves on them, knows their names and how much they like to eat; she shows concern for each of them individually. The kitchen is always a fun place to be for the staff and children because of Aunty P.

A brief Story about Aunty J.S. (a caregiver)

This was what she said: "I have 4 children and I live in the Western area of Freetown. My favorite food is cassava leaves and my favorite color is peach. The thing I enjoy most about my job and TRS is, I enjoy being with the children. I learn many things from them. The skills that I know but I don't use at TRS is tailoring and also I was 33 years old when I came to know Christ." Sam

Aunty J.S. is one of the newer members of our staff and is working with our babies and toddlers. And we are hoping that soon she will be using her tailoring skills to teach our teen moms how to sew! Recently, she helped to sew all the school uniforms for our kids…I can't imagine getting measurements and sewing uniforms for 70+ children, and completing it in a week! AMAZING!

Whose Daughter is She?

2011-04-02T12:26:00.000-05:00

"People who are treated as helpless come to hold a lesser view of themselves. People who believe they are "blessed to be a blessing" and not in need themselves come to a lesser view of the people they serve. These victim and savior complexes create a codependency that perpetuates the problems of poverty and far outweighs any temporary relief such missions provide…Poor people understand that getting help requires appearing helpless, and rich people unwittingly advance the helplessness of those they serve by seeing them as objects of charity, not equals." Joel Wickre of Blood:Water Mission

I was approached by a mom a few weeks ago, a mother in crisis…she can't pay the school fees for 2 of her 3 children (one is enrolled in our school as we are experimenting with opening our classrooms up to some in the community on a scholarship basis), she's been kicked out of the house they were living with because her "husband" is the father of only the youngest child and no longer wants to take responsibility for the other 2…and because of an illness a few months ago she lost her job…she is living with some friends and doing her best to provide a little for her children…she came with a picture of her daughter and said "this is your child, you can have her and do whatever you want with her"; when I asked her what she wanted she said, "I want a job so I can provide for my children." I was heartbroken to tell her that we have no positions available and excited that she asked for a job instead of a handout. BUT I was also heartbroken by her obvious willingness to give her child to a stranger, because that stranger is American and in her mind would take better care of her child…sure I could do a better job of providing financially for her daughter, I could make sure she eats 3 or more times a day, has plenty of clothes and sees a doctor when she is sick…all things we both want for the little girl…BUT I was heartbroken over this woman's belief that her only option was to give up her daughter…that she was powerless and helpless and had nothing to give. I looked her right in the eye (which is a sign of disrespect, which I didn't mean, I just forgot AGAIN!) and told her that she was the mother of this child, that God gave her to her and not to me, and that SHE could care for her. My intent was to encourage her and help her see that she was not helpless in this situation…but I left feeling like I had walked away from someone with a real need…

What really is the answer for this mother…a job would be ideal but…a handout would provide relief for a moment--a week or month--and then she'll need more; and doesn't that just create dependence and leave her feeling de-valued. She wants a job but there are none to be had…and she doesn't know how to apply for one or interview…

This happened over a week ago and I still don't know the right answer. But I do know this…it's getting easier and easier for me to say no…and harder and harder for me to truly know how to help. It might seem strange but I've tried the handout…and I've watched others give the handout…and I've realized the consequences, so I can say no. BUT I am more intensely aware that without some sort of help, it's entirely likely that children will go to bed hungry and mothers will choose to sell their bodies to feed their babies or give them up to a stranger who can give them education and food and shelter.

I'm wrestling this week with a lot of things…but trying to remember that God knows how to help; sometimes He gives us a "handout", some relief from what is our circumstances, and provides us enough to get by and creates in us a dependence, a NEED for Him daily AND sometimes he is more into development…transforming and creating us into people who give and receive.

And Q. said something to one of the boys this week…a boy who we have been working with for school scholarships and some food, who is not following through and using the resources right…he told him: "I don't have money to give you, I can't provide what the Americans can, BUT I have wisdom. AND if I gave you money today it would be gone tomorrow. BUT these words I have for you will last a lifetime." He went on to share with him how to obey and respect his elders, study hard, and learn to provide for himself, and he encouraged him that he could be a Doctor someday and have a family and a house and food in his stomach each day…that it is possible but it takes more than accepting a handout or expecting others to take care of you…you have to work for it.

In that moment I was reminded that there is sooooo much to learn from these men and women who have lived a life of struggle and suffering that I will never experience. They have so much to give me…and to truly love these people I cannot see myself as the savior and them the victim…I must know us to be equal in God's eyes…and that God is shaping us all.

The Worst Driver Ever

2011-03-30T14:04:00.000-05:00

On the first day I lived in St. Cloud I pulled into the left turn lane…to um, turn left!…and a car 2 lanes over…in the right turn land…turned LEFT! Right in front of me. I remember thinking WHAT in the world is wrong with this place. Why did God send me here to live…they drive like maniacs!

But today, I must confess that I, myself, have turned into the worst driver ever! Crazy drivers in St. Cloud have NOTHING on my new skills. They taught me defensive driving in Drivers Ed…in Sierra Leone, it's all Men, Women, motorcycles, cars, trucks, and podas for themselves; AGGRESSIVE driving is the key to getting anywhere...that and an EXTREME amount of patience and sense of humor!

I've only been driving for a few months here and I've had quite a few adventures:

First, there was the bus…yes, I hid a big "grey-hound" bus with my little car. It wasn't pleasant…I had to choose, the bus, the ditch (which by the way is a steep drop off) or the 2 motorcycles coming straight at me! And I chose the bus…and it was a hit and run because I just kept driving…I didn't want to end up in jail or have them confiscate my car until I gave them enough money to return the bus to perfect condition…and I figure I only took out my side mirror so what real damage did I do to the bus anyway…and no one was watching;)

One day I was out, taking a road that I take often and people started running at the car and shouting at me…seems that it was a "Common Understanding" that the route of the road was changed for the day…I needed to go through the parking lot to make a left turn…Ooops! Sorry, where are the road signs? Detour signs? Help a girl out!

And speak of road signs, I drive by stop signs all the time and don't stop. Osseh says they are just suggestions, and I hope he's right, and that he means that about ALL stop signs in SL…I think there are 3 or 4!

I have learned that it is acceptable to park your vehicle just about anywhere…in the middle of the street is fine…in fact if you want to park it in a manner that blocks all lanes of traffic you can…if you want to park it in the oncoming lane, FINE…really whatever is most convenient for you! And you have the right to be upset when someone hits you…you can call them "stupid fool" and punch them (this hasn't happened to me yet!

I got waved over by some police officers (or at least they were dressed like police officers) and asked if I was wearing slippers…they told me that they were doing checks on drivers footwear because they were very bored and thirsty…this was code for "give us money"..I played dumb blonde…worked out well! I also learned, later, that stopping for police officers is not always the wise thing to do…sometimes you should just keep driving…how can you know when to stop and when not to? Use your intuition…I look forward to my chance to run from the police…I mean to see them run after me as I'll be in the car and they'll be on foot! LOL!

The other day I went to a restaurant and came out and found that there were two lanes of cars parked behind mine…they made the drivers come out and move their cars so I could get out (that was nice) then they gave me hand signals to help me back up (not so nice because there were 3 of them all giving different suggestions, and I can pretty much assume that none of them had ever driven a vehicle before!) and then when I pulled out there were 5 cars trying to use 1 lane and go in 4 directions. NOT KIDDING! It was insanity. I decided then, that the parking lot at the Crossroads Mall on the Saturday before Christmas is a beautiful, peacefully calm place:)

At some point last week I hit a pothole just right and now the whole underside of the car feels like it is constantly shaking and about to fall off…not sure if it's worth fixing…I know I'm just going to hit a pothole….or a giant speed bump…of a motorcycle…or a bus again soon!

I wanted to go to the grocery store one day but I had to wait because my security guard told me that my car was too dusty to drive. TOO DUSTY!?! I've seen cars on the road with the front window so broken I'm sure you can see out of it…and vans that are duct taped together and are without doors and the dust will hinder my driving:) I am a terrible driver, but not that bad!

I am finding driving to be stressful and yet entertaining…I never know what crazy thing I will encounter while I'm out…Saturday I was stuck in traffic and a LARGE truck decided that things were just moving too slow, so the driver made another lane and came up next to me in oncoming traffic. People start honking and screaming at him and he turns and points at me in my little blue Nissan…look there's a white lady driving here…she must be the cause of it…he starts waving at me frantically trying to get me to move…this time my choice was stay or STAY…there was not an inch to spare…unfortunately for him, his plan to blame it all on the white girl didn't work so well…I had my windows rolled up and the music cranked and I just pretended to be oblivious:)

It's official, I'm going to be picking up some REALLY TERRIBLE driving skills while here in Sierra Leone…and your prayers for all of us who drive, walk, or transportation of any kind in Freetown are very much appreciated!

Yellow House!

2011-03-29T07:59:00.001-05:00

A few weeks ago my parents were here for a visit. Several of the little girls spent a lot of time sitting on my dad's lap. One of the little girls, S., often walks around the Center very sad. There are occasions when she smiles and laughs but they are rare. The week my parents were here I saw her smile and laugh, and it was so good because her smile lights up the whole room.

Later, on a quiet day at the Center, I noticed she was very sad again. She came and sat on my lap and I asked her several times why she was so sad. She eventually told me that she misses her papa very much. Her father died in a boat accident over a year ago. After that S. lived in the village with her mother who tried desperately to care for her children but could not so when TRS came and offered a home, school, food, and hope to the family they sent S. with her siblings to live at The Covering.

I recently was visiting some villages outside of Freetown and was reminded of how different the rest of the country is from the city. I tried to imagine what it had been like for all our Shenge kids to leave the "bush" and travel into Freetown for the first time. They left a place where they rarely saw a motor car to go to a place filled with too many of them. They left the quiet for the noisy! They left the small village for a home with 80 other children. And they've adjusted so quickly it's easy to forget how scary and difficult that journey was. It's hard to imagine what leaving ones home, language, food, and family behind is really like for a 8 year old.

S. misses her dad. She told me that she used to help him on the farm and spent much of the day working alongside him. Her favorite memories are of sitting on his lap and playing with him. She knows that he died on the boat an that he is never coming back. I got to remind her of my daddy and how she got to sit on his lap and that there are many uncles at TRS and she can sit in their lap and talk about her papa and that it's okay to cry. We also talked about Papa God…the Father who will never leave us and wants to have the type of relationship with us that we crawl up into His lap and share our grief and joy with.

S. will grow up at The Covering, surrounded by aunties and uncles who love her and protect her and teach her about Jesus; surrounded by brothers and sisters who have lost their fathers in the same accident. Please pray that she will be reminded everyday that she is loved by Papa God; pray that she will grow to trust Him with her tears and joys; pray that she will find joy here…that as she talks about her papa and shares her sadness that God will heal her heart and fill her with gladness.

From S.:

My favorite activity is basketball. I can dribble and I have made 4 baskets.

My favorite color is yellow because that's what house I was in for sports day (S. was the only girl in her team that could run most of the races, she worked very hard for her team that day and one 1 medal)

In Shenge I lived in a house with my papa, mama, 4 brothers and 2 sisters.

The think I like most about TRS is playing balance ball with the other girls.

When I grow up I want to be a teacher and teach class 2.

In school I am very good at my ABCs.

I thank Papa God for saving us.

My favorite song is "My Head, My Shoulders, My Knees, My Toes…All belong to Jesus!"

2011-03-27T15:33:00.001-05:00

We have some of the most amazing staff working for TRS! I have been privileged to get to know them and hear their stories over the last few months! Recently I asked one of the older boys at the Center to play the role of a journalist and ask each of the staff some questions about themselves. I would like to share parts of their stories with you…

"A Brief Story about Uncle Q…this is what he said:

I have 2 children and I live in Marjay Town; also the food I like best is green and rice. My favorite color is gray.

The things I enjoy most about my job are when I make sure that what ever is for the kids reach the kids and what ever is for the staff reach the staff. I enjoy the role that I play at TRS.

I have skills in drama but because of the time that is why I don't do it at TRS. The year I came to Christ was in 2003.

I grew up with my mother, because I lost my father when I was a small boy. It was difficult for my mother and even for me to attend school was a problem and housing was a problem.

I go to First Presbyterian Church and I am 35 years old. Before TRS I worked at COTN."

Uncle Q. shares his story with many of the teams that come to Sierra Leone. He is our Country Director and we are very blessed to have him as a leader of the staff and Big Brother to the children. Each time he shares the story of the struggle his mother went through to raise him and his brothers and sisters after his father died and his experiences during the war I am amazed at the protection and provision of God and at his plan and purposes in our lives.

I NEED Mexican Food...RIGHT NOW!

2011-03-25T14:05:00.001-05:00

I have a confession to make…something that won't surprise you all…I'm not very good at the blogging thing! I think about it during the day, and often come up with GREAT things to write about at night…but when I sit down to write, there is nothing there…it's like my words have gone the way of all the liquid in my body…sweated right out. So I'm going to try something new and I'm going to tell you about it in hopes that it will hold me accountable! I am planning to write 4 times a week with a different focus each time…on Mondays I'll tell you a story about the kids or what's happening at the Covering…on Wednesdays I'll share with you some funny things that have happened to me (seriously, there are quite a few of those!)…on Fridays I'll write about what I'm learning (I'm not promising anything profound)…and over the weekend I'm gonna write about one of our amazing staff members. I got this idea from a blog I read and she has very spiritual, deep titles for her days and I noticed someone else doing it and his titles were way catchy and neat-o…to be that creative! I'm just going to see if I can stick to a schedule; HA!

The counselor and I had a good laugh last night…I came out of the girls room at the Guest House shaking my head at being asked for yet another something…it seems that all they do some days is ask for things! Aunty Cari, we need ____________! Last night it was shelves, and what made me laugh was the realization that we'd given them so much stuff that they didn't have enough shelf space to put it on…and then I realized that if I gave them a shelf they'd ask for more stuff because they would find it 1/2 empty and pretty soon the room that was a blessing a few months ago because there is a real bed in it and the space is only shared with a few others and not 25 would become to small and cramped!

Honestly, the laugh started out as annoyance…I'm tired of constantly being asked for stuff! It turned into some what of a rant about what my time is often consumed with in SL…requests for help, stuff, money, food, more, more, more…but when I stopped to really think (Duncan reminded me really) that we all struggle with the difference between want and need…that it's a privilege to help meet needs to the point where people actually have the space to want…and then need to be taught the difference! I spend MANY Sunday's in America talking with children about the difference between want and need, using the children I'd met in Africa as examples…and now I'm realizing that I need to teach these blessed children in Africa the difference between want and need…and I come up short…because I don't know the difference.

Right now I'm staring at a picture of a meal at Chipotle some lovely friend of mine pasted on Facebook (THANKS A LOT!) and thinking that I NEED Chipotle…but it's only a want, right!?! There are basic things that we as humans need…food, oxygen, water, love…and I can honestly tell you that I have never been in a place where I didn't have those needs met…other than a few times as a child, when asthma made getting oxygen VERY difficult and I remember struggling for breath…I really don't know what it is like to be in need. I do know that after I got air again I quickly forgot what it was like to need.

But these beautiful children in Sierra Leone can teach me about being in need…and about trusting. They know what it is like to NEED…and I wonder, is it because of grace that they've forgotten need…is it really not the difference between want and need that is important…but the difference lies in where we take our wants and needs?

If I am in need or want and I TRUST God with it…I tell Him, "Lord, I'd really like______________, what do you think?" and I listen will I not discover a Father who wants to shower me with EVERY GOOD AND PERFECT GIFT (James 1:17)? If instead, I strive and grasp for what I need and want…trying by all means to get it for myself…or being ashamed of it attempt to hide it from God and those around me…will I not find myself in a place of either getting that which I should not have had OR living in continual discontent?

So, what am I saying through all this rambling? That I'm learning that we all have wants and needs…that only God knows how to meet them in ways that will bring us life and not death (sin)…and that when I encounter requests for things (like shelves or curtains or candy or Chipotle) I can stop and say "Thank you God, that you have met our needs so that we have space to want! Help us to remember to TRUST first and give us the freedom of contentment!"

Activity Room!

2011-03-23T10:39:00.000-05:00

I have just a few pictures to share with you! We've been busy the last few months with visitors which means lots of new, fun things to share...We've been blessed with an activity room filled with toys, books, games, and craft supplies and each day a group of 7-10 kids comes to the Guest House to play! Here are a few pictures of our excitement...it's so precious to see the kids light up and enjoy some time to just be kids. Thank you to ALL of you who had a part in making this happen. Today is music day and I am looking forward to attempting to teach the kids how to play some of the flutes.

Update!

2011-03-15T15:18:00.000-05:00

March 2011 Update

For THIS we have prayed!

2011-01-11T11:33:00.000-06:00

water into wine

2011-01-09T08:17:00.000-06:00

Over a month ago some of the girls sang a song in church that has been stuck in my head since then. It doesn't help that I hear a child singing it at least once a day; it has a catchy tune and I can't seem to stop singing it....the lyrics go something like this...(you'll have to add your own tune)
"Mary, Mary was a virgin woman
Mary, Mary was a virgin woman
Mary, Mary was a virgin woman
Master Jesus turned water into wine.
David, David was a small boy
David, David was a small boy
David, David was a small boy
Master Jesus turned water into wine."
There were lots of verses naming characters of the Bible and each ended the same.

This morning, in our Bible Study, we came to the verses in John where Jesus went to the wedding and turned the water into wine...the kids had some great questions...like did Jesus drink wine?!? why did he talk to his mother like that?!? why didn't he announce what he was doing and do it infront of everyone instead of keeping it a secret?!? (okay, so maybe these were questions Pst. Daniel and I asked but I'm sure the kids were thinking them!) and the discussion lead to a point where we talked about Jesus taking what is ordinary and turning it into extraordinary...
God took and ordinary girl and made her the mother of the Messiah!
God took a small shepherd boy and turned him into a king!
God took a homeless murderer and saved a nation!
Jesus called some fishermen and made them leaders of a world-wide movement!
Jesus took a small meal and fed a multitude!
Jesus turned H20 into (okay so here, if I was smarter, I'd put the chemical dohicky for wine, I'm sure it's much more complicted that H20!)

What was the point really? That we are all ordinary. Many days the confession that I read this morning in my new favorite book I am naked and I am right ashamed. I know how monstrously inhumane I can be. Raging at children for minor wrongdoings while I'm the one defiling the moment with sinful anger. Hoarding possessions while others die of starvation. Entertaining the mind with trivial pretties when I haven't bowed the head and heart in a prayer longer than five minutes in a week. My tongue has had a razor edge and my eyes have rolled haughty and my neck has been stiff and graceless and I have lived the filth ugly, and idolater, a glutton, and a grace thief who hasn't had time for thanks. And yet God uses me.

I had the priveledge this week to listen to our senior staff tell the stories of redemption that make them the men and women they are today...

A Muslim boy became a pastor who leads hundreds to Christ...Master Jesus turned water into wine!
A street wise girl became a children's ministry leader and the mother of 2...wait 25...Master Jesus turned water into wine!
A man hurt terribly by war became a man who brings peace....Master Jesus turned water into wine!
A young mother, abandoned by her boyfriend became a nurse who encourages and calls our girls to chose a different way...Master Jesus turned water into wine!

For the children we talked about how God chose them...they were no different than any other child living on the street or in the fatherless & motherless homes of Sierra Leone. Yet, God chose them for a purpose, a plan bigger than themselves and bigger than any of us can fathom.
Some of them will end up in America because God has a plan and a purpose for them there.
Some will stay in Salone because God wants to change a nation for himself.
Some will go to Ghana, Malawi or wherever! (One boy thinks Brazil would be a great place for God to send him because they have a FINE soccer team!!!!) God will take these ordinary children and turn them into extraordinary followers of Him! None of them will be left out or not chosen...God has a calling for each of them...they just have to be willing to listen to the Jesus Heartburn.

I have the most beautiful nieces in the world...

2011-01-08T13:42:00.001-06:00

2011-01-04T15:23:00.000-06:00

I have to let you in on a bit of a secret...the kids at The Covering are KIDS...they are not always precious little angels dressed up all cute in their Christmas clothes and filled with gratidue and gentleness. I'm sure that's a surprise to you! It always surprises me when the darling little 3-year old girl pitches a fit or that sweet boy that loves to cuddle with me hauls off and slaps the darling little 3 year-old. It happens all over the world! Even in Sierra Leone with our special little ones.
Here's an example, you know that moment, after everyone has opened their Christmas presents and said their thank yous and then you wish that you had gotten something else...maybe the sweater is the wrong color or the vidoe game is the wrong version...and in America we have this little thing called a return policy and we return what we didn't want and get what we did! It's soooo convenient! It's hard to be grateful for the thing that we didn't want or didn't seem to work right. Our kiddos did the same thing...just minutes after opening Christmas presents (that they were EXTREMELY grateful for and it was so fun to watch them open all the gifts) some of them started looking around and noticing that others got something "better" than them, there were a few that were missing pieces, and some of the boys didn't realize that if you take the motorized car apart it won't work anymore:) they had theirs in pieces in no time! And then it was, Aunty Cari I want that one or I don't like this color or mine is broken. And there is no return policy in Sierra Leone...so being content with what we recieve is one of the hardest lessons to learn on either side of the pond.
And here's the deal...I realized in the midst of it that I do the EXACT same thing with God (and something tells me I'm not the only one)...I recieve gifts from him, presents everyday and after a few moments of gratitude I begin to wonder "WHAT WAS HE THINKING!?!?" this is not what I expected or asked for...it's messy or hard...it's painful or not quite right. "Gee, Lord, thanks for this beautiful day to spend at the beach, but it would have been better if the waves were a bit bigger." "Lord, this $15 pint of ice cream I splurged on for Christmas is sooo good, thanks for providing it for me, but could you just make sure the electricity stays on because the more times it melts and freezes the worse it tastes:)" OR "Lord, thank you for the priveledge of being a part of bringing hope and life to these kids, but it's just not home and I am tired of being in this 3rd culture exsitance." "Lord, I'm grateful for these precious moments, BUT..." and there seems to always be a BUT.
So, I've done my gratefulness list...and I'm going to keep working on it and now I need to work on getting rid of the BUT...maybe SL will help me erase the buts and my butt (sorry, I had to put that...just some "little" humor since I missed all the holiday jokes!) 'cuse rice will do that and so will $15 pints of ice cream and no return policy.

-dancing boys during prayer time
-dreams for tomorrow
-reconnecting with friends
-quiet mornings

2010-12-31T15:49:00.000-06:00

950. a night of prayer and keeping watch for the new year
951. the arrival of our newest staff member
952. an hour spend holding a child while she slept
953. pepe soup
954. "trust in the Lord! trust in the Lord! trust in the Lord!"
955. another year of life for the caring, trusting, beautiful woman who is my mom! Love you!
956. the confusion that causes my stomach to hurt and the sleep to flee and me to pray anew
957. friends to talk me through it
958. the encouraging word at just the right time
959. another fall and no broken bones
960. "i come with pain, but I go with joy."
961. "see you next year"
962. all things are made new
963. spending New Year's Eve 6 time zones away from home...that means if I'm home next year for New Year's Eve I'll have an extra 12 hours this year...right!?!?
964. there should be fireworks tonight
965. Monday is a holiday too
966. dancing lizards
967. wedding pictures...was it only a year ago
968. scissors returned
969. plans for what's next
970. fresh pinneapple
971. being cool enough last night to sleep under the quilt
972. I. wearing snowpants to bed tonight
973. my SP gals who continue to pray and love on me
974. financial gifts that keep me here
975. electricity
976. new floors
977. getting caught up on emails
978. laughter of children
979. facing fear
980. five suitcases
981. no more goat crying all night long
982. watching kids movies
983. Aunty Musa
984. Aunty Geraldine
985. having enough
986. please don't go
987. confusion over why the new uncle is black not white
988. music all night long
989. a chance to teach
990. text messages
991. hearing Kj sing and Lydia laugh
992. days that pass quickly and full
993. Z. sneaking in to see Aunty Jessie
994. another Christmas Card from home
995. my journal
996. not being alone on New Year's Eve
997. a couch to rest on
998. bananas from up country
999. getting to 999...what will I do next?
1000. a new year, a chance to start anew and see what God will do next
As 2010 comes to a close I think back an realize how crazy this year has been...My baby sister got married, I turned 30, put my house on the market, quit my job, got a beautiful new neice, found myself spending every spare moment with a wonderful man, and moved to Africa! I've lived in 4 different houses, had 6 different house/room mates, crossed the Atlantic 3 times, attempted to learn a new language, learned over 200 new names and faces, and drank more coke than ever before. It's been a year of change...a year of realizing who my true friends are...a year of laughter and lots of tears...a year full of see-ya-later and "we welcome you". I've learned that sometimes when God grants the dreams of your heart it doesn't look like you've always imagined and it's not easy; that gratefulness far surpasses noticing all the junk around you; that the constant conversation with God and the people that He puts in my life is the only way to survive. I'm trying to learn to be present in what is now, with who is now, and with where I am now instead of running ahead but my head is filled with hopes and dreams for what's next!
Whew! I wonder what 2011 will bring!

2010-12-30T05:46:00.000-06:00

921. a new apron--hand dyed by a new friend
922. the sky today...it's gray and dreary and you can't tell where the sky stops and the ocean starts
923. watching hours of movies with I and J...yeah, I'm that kind of babysitter
924. a cup of Starbucks Coffee
925. restful sleep
926. bright colors
927. pictures of family on the fridge
928. morning hugs
929. anticipating a shower in CLEAN water...in only 1 month :)
930. google--it's helpful for all kinds of things, including how to get rid of hair worms and scalp fungus
931. cultural interpreters
932. "sweet Salone, where the women spit through their teeth"
933. day dreams
934. blessings from sweet mothers
935. Eeeh!
936. the cancel button for those accidentally send emails:)
937. picassa
938. donuts...with ice cream!
939. diet coke
940. humble gratitude
945. thunder
946. 5 peacocks next door
947. the smell of a bleached clean kitchen
948. waking up to birds chirping in December
949. "Be all here and be at peace… content… awake —- Alive. When I am mindful of this moment, the mind fills with God and the heart fills with peace and joy-thanks fills the prayers and isn’t the only way God can come to us is through the door of this moment? Here." Anne Voskamp

2010-12-26T12:37:00.000-06:00

800. Merry Christmas

801-891. 90 new Chrismtas outfits!

892. New shoes!

893. New earings!

894. a new dress

895. a donation from "Airtel"

896. Dance!

897. tents...because it was so HOT we had to move the party outside!

898. buscuits from Father Christmas

899. Joyful smiles!

900. Ensure...it makes a great afternoon snack:)

901. learning about giving our chairs to the "stranger"

902. Big Brother Q.

903. A Christmas Play...complete with shepherd and sheep:)

904. special Chrismtas Food.

905. Happy Birthday Jesus!

906. there are no words to describe how good this tastes when you feel like it's a MILLION degrees out

907. that feeling that you've eaten too much special Christmas food.

908. a new keyboard

909. new drums to rock out on

910. GIFTS to give

911. the "strangers" among us

912. having enough gifts to give our visitors one-one

913. giving away FOOTBALLS!

914. the dollar store in the US...where you can get enough gifts for everyone on a small budget

915. the Book of Hope...donate by some new missionary friends

916. new "motorcars" that make noise and flash lights...from "Father Christmas"

917. new sandals from him too

918. Merry Christmas!!
919. EVERYONE who gave to make this Christmas special in Sierra Leone!
920. Skyping with my family last night! I MISS YOU!

2010-12-21T15:40:00.000-06:00

754. fb messages from friends
755. Christmas cards hanging in the dinning room
756. all the girls getting their hair done for Christmas
757. making Christmas cookies to share
758. imaginations...today we turned a piece of cardboard into a laptop and "talked" to our sponsors!
759. Christmas drawings from the kids
760. loving, concerned aunties
761. a donation of 2423 cans of Ensure...now we just hope our kids like it
762. a donation of crackers, juice, rice and buscuits from Sierra Leone's Father Christmas...too bad he had malaria and couldn't wear his suit
763. A. asking the guy from Mercy Ships if he was Father Christmas's father!?!
764. A present to open on Christmas Day! Thanks Michelle!
765. bonding time with Z.
766. Naptime...today I got all 4 asleep at the same time!
767. a long staff meeting about keeping the kiddos healthy
768. the promise of a HOT shower tonight
769. watching 2 men spend HOURS wrapping gifts for the boys
770. Inviting the neighbors to our Christmas Party
771. jokes
772. hope for the future
773. watching Ice Age with Santos
774. Osseh's new bling
775. things that make me laugh
776. the small Christmas Tree on the coffee table
777. http://stuffchristianslike.net/
778. chocolate cake from Aunty Marie
779. sleeping past 7am
780. a visit from an Aunt
781. plane tickets home
782. pictures
783. finding everything I "lost" today
784. spagetti
785. bottle caps and lids that provide hours of entertainment
786. a clean living room
787. a slow walk up the hill holding one small hand
788. "Why are some people poor and some people rich?"
789. "One Imam told me...but I want to know what you think"
790. a hundred hugs, everyday
791. quiet, stillness
792. the ocean out the front window
793. our 7 coming in 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 5th, 6th, and 7th in their classes at school
794. enough left over soft drinks to provide refreshement
795. a new idea
796. breathing in GRACE
797. night time prayers
798. a few moments to stop and paint my toe nails
799. "The Grace of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and the Love of God and the Sweet Fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with us all, today and forevermore."

2010-12-19T13:41:00.001-06:00

676. dancing under the stars
677. Sleep!
678. talking with the kids about Jesus coming as the best gift ever
679. giving Christmas Presents to the staff
680. getting Christmas Cards from friends from home...thanks Jim & Joyce, Joel & Holly, and Grandpa & Grandma Logan
681. a letter from Kj with the verses she is learning on it
682. a big brother who takes good care of his younger siblings...all 83 of them
683. "I've never enjoyed my life so much!"
684. nap time with Jr. (I am AMAZED that I managed to get this 3 year old to stop long enough to sleep...I failed with his older brother...mostly because I fell asleep myself!)
685. No school this week!
686. a school outing to the BEACH
687. that Pastor Daniel complains about the amount of peppers in the rice more than I do. WOW! that was some HOT stuff!
688. finding a cab last night! YIKES!
689. finding a chocolate cake in the fridge...is it magic or is it Marie?
690. being up late enough to see the moon reflect off the water
691. a horse on the beach
692. watching or kids at a school outing be the most respectful, well behaved ones there
693. Pastor Daniel intervening when kids in the community do stupid things
694. homemade chocolate chip cookies...that I made myself!
695. popcorn
696. watching Popeye with Sam, Fallah, and Alie
697. sleep walkers at a party:)
698. "It's my job!"
699. sticking my head in the freezer to remember home and why it's good to be here in December:)
700. God's protection from harm
701. Singing "Joy to the World" at the top of our lungs
702. a present to open on Christmas Day
703. smile box
704. practicing being present
705. tank tops and flip flops in December
706. accepted apologies
707. a new week
708. The Word became flesh and blood, and moved into the neighborhood. We saw the glory with our own eyes, the one-of-a-kind glory, like Father, like Son, Generous inside and out, true from start to finish. John 1:14
709-752. Our 40 staff and 3 volunteers! Love them!

753. A little FUN of my own (it's supposed to be a balloon dog?!?)

2010-12-15T15:18:00.000-06:00

658. loud laughter over some crazy African film coming up from downstairs
659. standing upright after a day of sickness
660. fighting with the printer...it reminds me of Crossroads! I fought with that printer everyday for 6 years and I miss it...
661. visits from the kiddos
662. my mom's Christmas letter
663. A Christmas dinner invite...they have a TURKEY!
664. honest conversations about life here
665. just be present
666. "professional" pictures of our Sunday party
667. Jessie's dress
668. a cold couch
669. a change in weather that actually makes it feel cool every once in a while
670. a mix-up avoided
671. soup
672. "the devil is a liar!"
673. time to say thanks again
674. coke in the fridge
675. a gift of bananas

2010-12-12T17:19:00.000-06:00

644. a few days "unplugged"
645. getting my internet back
646. not breaking anything on the stairs
647. making cookies
648. a honest converstation about why Santa Claus doesn't deliver presents to Africa..."if he's real why does he only like people from America?"
649. my sis-in-love's list of thank yous
650. that I don't have to complain about the snow...I can complain about missing it though!
651. an interpreter who is a phone call away
652. laughter
653. devotions in the gazebo with the girls
654. a new week
655. the silence downstairs which means I can go to bed
656.

657. hope.

2010-12-07T15:23:00.000-06:00

620. hot showers
621. a picture of what it could be
622. a grandmother's tears and courage
623. knowing that growth and change is happening even when I don't see it
624. a thank you
625. laughter over small things
626. one step closer to a car
627. an inbox full of encouragement and news from home
628. excitement about a Christmas Party!
629. an ipod full of movies...thank you Osseh for sharing!
630. catching a glimpse of how wealthy I am
631. a lock on the door
632. a moment to catch my breath
633. Il Divo
634. anticipating a Christmas Eve bonfire...roasting marshmellows and singing carols...now that's a new one!
635. wata de
636. Mercy Ships
637. all the ducklings are safely home again for another night.
638. conversations with Q. about color...is that cream or yellow?
639. Pastor Daniel coming to rescue us again
640. Fatima and Kelvina
641. another request...another answer
642. cucumbers and tomotoes!!!
643. the Lord has sustained me for one more day...thank you!

2010-12-05T15:58:00.000-06:00

600. moving day
601. new Christmas songs
602. nightime walks up the hill
603. flashlights
604. sweating more because I just saw a Sierra Leonian wearing a parka and knit hat
605. skype with my dad
606. finding a taxi in the dark
607. several hours of baby time
608. a good example and role model
609. I'm done, done!
610. dreams
611. the police band coming to play Christmas music (BEFORE midnight!)
612. cooking for myself today
613. Aunty Alice
614. the excitement of 3 girls getting the chance to cook on their own
615. a hunt for cookie-cutters
616. a new offer of support
617. lessons learned...the hope that they don't need to be taught again
618. gentle reminders to trust
619. how the message I prepared for the children turned into a message for me..."if it's what you want Pappa God, it's okay with me"

2010-12-01T14:52:00.000-06:00

583. encouragement from friends
584. The "Women's Vocational Training Center and Saloon"...no that's not a typo...this is a great place to go learn how to fix hair and give manicures in Freetown;)
585. "The baby had given up the vaults of heaven to be born in the valley of a feed trough, and the cradle for the baby was the manger for the animals, the place where all the ones wandering in the fields came to be fed. Born in Bethlehem, the town with the name that means house of bread, the baby came to feed all the lost ones." Ann Voskamp
586. a new watch for Sam
587. the gift of laughter over the craziness of it all
588. "Aunty...did you go to America yesterday, we did not see you all day?"
589. the sweet ones who shared with me today that their papas died in the water and they still dream about...I am so grateful that they are talking!
590. a mother's dreams for her 8 year old son
591. baracuda...yes we eat baracuda here
592. my new dress coming back from the tailors
593. cipro...our new best friend
594. a ride home
595. Moses
596. surviving town
597. that the first rat I saw in SL was already dead and I missed stepping on it
598. words that whisper to my heart
599. My God who says, "I know my daughter, I know."

2010-11-29T16:15:00.000-06:00

576. new feet
577. the simple ask...I want to read
578. resolution
579. new ceilings
580. the possiblity of a french silk pie blizzard in 2 months
581. a fixed toilet
582. purse shopping tomorrow

2010-11-26T16:44:00.000-06:00

491-536. The 45 precious children whose birthday's we celebrated today.
537. Watching the staff get so excited about a PARTY!

538. Shoe shopping...

539. A BIRTHDAY PARTY!

540. Our babies survived the party chaos...

541. The future pastor

542. Beautiful Girls.

543. Fine bobos.

544. Helpers to cut the cake.

545. Mother and child

546. Auntie Patricia

547. Fruity drinks and Isatu

548. Surviving shopping in ton

549. Avoiding a fight because I didn't give the crazy man at Lumley a visa

550. reading a book for a 2nd time and finding out that i totally missed the point the first time.

551. Staff prayer in the afternoon

552. new socks

553. walking a mile to get new socks

554. the same 6 imodium pills in my purse as a month ago!!! (that means I haven't used any this month! WOW!)

555. reunions

556. saying no to buying things that I don't need because you can still shop online from Sierra Leone and that's bad when all 5 seasons of House are on sale!

557. BBC radio

558. sharing food

559. finding the right fabric

560. strawberry, kiwi, banana crystal light

561. drinking 1.5 l of water today!

562. a nice bed with a mosquito net to sleep under

563. aloe vera

564. passing 200 cars stuck in traffic and still making it safely home

565. God's protection everyday

566. 3 more packets of candy corn

567. dreaming up a Christmas pageant for the kids

568. hip, hip, hooray

569. at The Covering we pray for each on birthdays...and God's gifts are enough

570. hearing the kids sing, "I am fearfully and wonderfully made!" with extra enthusiasm

571. hearing the kids sing a song from CEF (I remember it from backyard Bible Club) "I am inright, upright, downright, outright happy all the time!)

572. Watching Mohamed and Daniel counsel a mom who misses her children

573. Aunty Marie baking 4 cakes from scratch

574. cold coke--a gift from Rema

575. a family that loves me...you all looked so cozy in your turtlenecks and sweaters yesterday...I miss you!

2010-11-24T15:42:00.000-06:00

472. visits from Julia
473. kind words spoken
474. Love never fails
475. Il Divo Christmas CD
476. a yam and a bag full of oranges
477. "The righteous will flourish like a palm tree...they will flourish in the courts of our God." (Ps. 92:12-13)
478. a Christmas Card in the mail
479. watching the kids share their lunch with strangers
480. books read over skype
481. older sisters who translate stories for their brother
482. diligent care of our sick ones
483. NPA back on
484. a peaceful neighborhood
485. the simple "have a nice day"
486. counting blessings...I'll get there by Christmas!
487. healthy days
489. Osh ya
490. Lynnay and Lynae!

2010-11-23T16:43:00.000-06:00

462. little boys eating with forks and knives for the first time
463. intent eyes watching every move
464. the Word of God spoken at training this morning
465. knowing what 11 million in cash looks like
466. taking to Kj, Lydia, Lydia, and Anna
467. the bat that managed to get in the house also managed to leave the house
468. email
469. clean water to brush my teeth
470. Praise Him, Praise Him all you little children...God is Good, God is good!
471. 60 years of marriage

452...

2010-11-22T13:23:00.000-06:00

452. the beach!
453. sand between my toes.
454. long talks about living life in W. Africa
455. talking with my parents over skype
456. "we are standing...good morning Auntie Cari, good morning friend!"
457. taking time to be really grateful
458. a fantastic dinner
459. Aunty Marie having school with the toddlers...fly, fly, fly
460. road construction (praise God in everything) rsght
461. "God isn't nice. God isn't safe. God is a consuming fire. Though He cares about the sparrow, He rarely dotes or pampers. His main business is not ensuring that you and I get parking spots close to the mall entrance or groceries on sale this week. His main business is making you and me holy."

444...

2010-11-20T14:48:00.000-06:00

444. the sound of children giggling outside the door
445. when God answers a prayer before you really even ask it
446. the humility of knowing that I will never be able to carry a 5 gallon bucket of water on my head
447. the reminder of ALL that I take for granted
448. a day set aside to rest and reflect
449. the chance to cook my own food
450. free books
451. The hope of the righteous brings joy, but the expectation of the wicked will perish. Proverbs 10:28

421...

2010-11-19T13:06:00.000-06:00

A thumbs up from Victor

Um...CUTE!

So sweet.

Abubakkar!

Starting to feel better!

Play time!

Cheese Ball.

Sweetness!

Take my picture!

Pose for the camera.

A nice moment.

Joy, Joy, Joy!

Fun with Uncle Daniel

Pile on Aunty Jessie!

My buddies.

School time!

New Friends.

Mary smiles! WOW!

Sunset off the balcony!

Can you believe how good God is?!?

WOW!

Kj...this one's for you...it crawled into my shoe and I stepped on it BUT I didn't scream!
You'd be proud of your Aunty Cari!

401...

2010-11-18T15:17:00.000-06:00

401. my calculator is back on my computer...it works again!
402. a BEAUTIFUL sunset tonight
403. Olu
404. hope
405. Oral Rehydration Solution...thank you Anna, those little packets saved the day yesterday!
406. it's always July
407. a pink car...which I am not going to buy but tempted me for a moment
408. the quiet one who just comes up to hold my hand
409. little ones who fall asleep in my lap
410. a new aunty whom Lucy adores
411. Moses making faces to respond to questions
412. Katija tricking the caregivers into feeding her 2x
413. spending a few hours in the babies room
414. substitute teacher aka Pastor Daniel
415. God asks for praise not perfection and gives grace not a grindstone
416. gifts from upcountry
417. surviving big falls...Jessie and I have both survived one now
418. weird bumps sometimes just disappear on their own
419. new shoes for everyone!
420. time

376...

2010-11-16T15:14:00.000-06:00

376. Benadryl
377. "so come and rejoice! what was lost is found." I love this song
378. finding the kids washing the walls...they drew all over them with crayon and had to clean them so they don't do it again.
379. watching them have SO much fun washing the walls...Pst. Daniel turned it into this great game
380. having semi-clean walls at the center again
381. watching 15+ kids hoover around a children's Bible for an hour
382. hearing one of the quiet boys (Ibrahim Kanu) point at the pictures and tell the stories to everyone else
383. the walk to the center...a great time to pray and look at the ocean
384. the girls plaiting my hair...OUCH! but they had so much fun
385. finding explainations for why I am soooo tired all the time
386. sharing
387. it's Tuesday already
388. new matresses
389. learning humility
390. time to just be with the kids
391. the hopefilled look in their eyes everyday when they know sponsors are calling
392. the strangeness of this place wearing off
393. good news from across the ocean
394. long emails from good friends...makes me feel like I am not missing out on everything going on at home.
395. 1 Cor. 3:18 "And we with unvieled faces all reflect the Lords glory, are being transformed with ever increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."
396. practical jokes...today one of the boys put palm oil all over his hand (it's bright orange) and then came to me pretending he was wounded...he thought it was soooo funny when I wanted to rush him to the hospital...he proceeded to show me his "wounds" over and over!
397. fresh fruit deliveries to the front door
398. a simple day
399. "wash your body everyday, eat good food, wear clean clothes, drink clear water, get plenty of exercise and sleep well" our preschoolers have been singing this song for weeks...it's so cute.
400. prayer...he's the only one who really, really, really understands

351...

2010-11-15T17:09:00.000-06:00

351. that I haven't gotten a parasite (that I know of) yet
352. Mohamed's gentle way of breaking up fights
353. Aunty Marie...she made 3 little girls and 2 big girls feel like princesses tonight...
354. she made deviled eggs!
355. one of the girls singing loudly about Jesus in a taxi with a Muslim driver
356. having someone care if we are out past dark
357. PZ
358. buying pampers on the side of the road
359. Regina's laughter when her icecream on a stick fell a part
360. "Tomorrow there is no school, so will you come play with we?"
361. the HUGE fish we saw while driving by the beach today...God makes some strange looking creatures
362. a new baby in the family
363. the glowing smile of a new mom who just got the she has been praying for
364. pre-made child-sized African outfits
365. large "rodents" under the table, tickling my feet
366. that I was not the only one sweating this morning in the babies room! the place warm!
367. watching the little boys play football in jerseys that completley swallow them up
368. peaceful, dreamless sleep
369. washing my feet after a walk in town
370. watching Osseh get interviewed by a journalist about the road conditions...it's on record: the police don't do their jobs...I hope he doesn't get a ticket tomorrow!
371. Christmas music in the car
372. seeing the Christmas "store" (aka one woman on the sidewake with Christmas items) open for business
373. talking about Shenge
374. an un-known national holiday tomorrow
375. Uncle Andrew and Aunty Jessie...the game ends in a tie! maybe, just maybe the teams are even this time around.

326...

2010-11-14T16:47:00.001-06:00

326. Nkkya...some sort of peanut, cassava, sugar power...so sweet
327. 2 Chronicles 20:21 Give thanks to the Lord, for his steadfast love endures forever."
328. Supprise 4 stick winners
329. dinner on the patio, overlooking the ocean...and having it paid for!
330. ice cream on a stick.
331. WAWA...West Africa Wins Again! what else can you say when someone is pushing a taxi the wrong direction down the middle of the street?
332. Laughter with new friends
333. "Aunty Cari is my best friend!" Kadiatu
334. Sore losers who get coaxed to play again
335. that the electrician lives next door
336. prayers lifted in the Name of Jesus
337. carrots, carrots, and more carrots
338. 2 whole days without coke
339. that God gives me ideas in the middle of a "sermon" and it changes everything
340. the TRS thanksgiving Psalm...we wrote it today we'll share it next week:)
341. patience
342. the Kj is not here to see me freak out over the crazy bugs...although I would love to have her see all of them! (Kj, do you want pictures?)
343. video skype with Mom and Dad
344. groundnut soup with fish balls
345. getting fish balls without bones this time
346. find and extra 100
347. mornings
348. for long talks in the girls room
349. for Aunty Bintu
350. "We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you.” King Jehosaphat prays...

301...

2010-11-13T14:28:00.000-06:00

301. funny, akward emails
302. not getting pulled over by the police for having too many people in a taxi because I'm white...the taxi driver was so appreciative of my skin color today!
303. breakfast...pancakes, crepes, and eggs
304. less things to complain about
305. cold water
306. indoor waiting rooms a the hospital
307. Doctors, nurses, adminsitrators who leave behind nice, clean hospitals in Europe or America to serve desperate, poor people in Africa...
308. One in particular...I watched her scurry around the building for 3+ hours today, non-stop...everytime I go there I see her running here and there...she must sleep well at night
309. long conversations walking down the hill to Lumley
310. A ride back up the hill from Lumley
311. the fan by my bed
312. friends who reach out to ask how I am doing
313. Sundays
314. watching little boys enjoy icecream...which can be bought in small plastic baggies on the side of the road
315. moments of clarity
316. wet wipes
317. the way that everyone greets everyone when walking into a room...even strangers.
318. the way strangers gather to comfort each other in a loss
319. tears, because life is so precious and sacred
320. that Jessie never mentions that I stink...even though I KNOW I do
321. the special bread that is sold out of the trunk of the "special" car...and that Abdul knows the dealer
322. Abdul and left over apple cobbler
323. top-up
324. today we went in the opposite direction as traffic...and it cleared before we had to return
325. snow in MN...sorry, I know you all are complaining about it and I would be too if I were there but seriously, I miss it!

276...

2010-11-12T15:18:00.000-06:00

276. that I live in Freetown and not Kono
277. when God keeps me awake for a few hours at night to tell me what He needs to say
278. falling asleep waiting for Jessie to make a Scrabble move
279. "WooooIe! This is so good I could slap someone!" Charles
280. a-digitty-diggity-a-y...a new language?!? is it real
281. Dear Lord, did you know there are HUGE lizards here...like 5ft long!?! do I have to be grateful for those? they have poisonous saliva!
282. finting superman underwear in the bale
283. watching Osseh and 8 women sort out the underwear
284. that Jessie reminds me to take my medicine everynight...I'd die without her
285. the Jesus film comes in Krio
286. picking out a new dress styles with Pastor Daniel:)
287. apple cobbler
288. Eh!
289. no school tomorrow
290. 5 year anniversaries
291. sisters who leave to comfort a sister in crisis
292. a shared donut with Umaru
293. a FAITHFUL provider
294. the possibility of finding joy in each moment
295. finding treasures in the garbage
296. online magazines...I seriously just got one called Conversations: A Forum for Authentic Transformation...this month is about Contemplation and Action...thinking it was created for me...but that would be kinda egotistical to think that a bunch of really smart people published a jornal for me
297. Tuesday is a national holiday of some sort
298. volunteers
299. one fallen leaf
300. Jesus knows....

251...

2010-11-11T13:29:00.000-06:00

251. facebook chats with Susie
252. a brother who can fix my computer problems!
253. my mom, she's the best and I miss her
254. "that is not a car, that's me and my wife!"
255. new wigs that make school field trips extra exciting
256. people who donate blood...here you have to buy it
257. new shoes
258. free music!
259. the possibilities of new friendships and new guests
260. flushing toilets--they flushe everytime this week!
261. starbucks coffee packets
262. coming home to find my flipflops have been scrubbed clean
263. security lights...actually remembering to turn them on before being asked (no, Andrew, that hasn't happened yet but I'm working on it:)
264. someone to talk through the panic with
265. Maligie's mischevious smile and his ability to miss nearly everyday of school...hmm:)
266. gentle reminders that this is in GOD'S HANDS and I am not responsible for even a fraction of it
267. "I am not an immigration officer...I'm doing their job!"
268. learning ALL about surnames
269. large bags of rice
270. stickers
271. "Please sleep with us here tonight!"
272. shouts of excitement over new laundry bowls
273. more shouts of excitement over new mops
274. movement...slow but steadily...there is forward movement
275. "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trail you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you be overjoyed when his glory is revealed". 1 Peter 4:12-13